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Why don't i always get a reply when i send a pm to a user?

Started by tolbs17, September 04, 2019, 04:56:26 PM

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rickmastfan67

Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:52:08 PM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 05, 2019, 05:42:48 PM
Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:39:18 PM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 05, 2019, 05:36:50 PM
Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:01:17 PM
Quote from: MNHighwayMan on September 05, 2019, 01:06:53 PM
I'm not sure this is a question I want to ask, but I'm going to ask it anyway. Just how many PMs have you been sending?
like i sent it to 30 users.

And you’re wondering why a lot of people didn’t want to respond?...spam much?
No, I want to see who would use highway divides. It was apparently down and not a single person has been on that site where I got the answers from. It's called mass messaging.

It’s all call spam messaging. Had I noticed you sent out a message to a billion different users I wouldn’t have replied either.  Worse, is now you want some sort of justification from everyone who didn’t answer.   Maybe a thread would have sufficed since it probably would have left the door open to people who use the site to respond?  I know this is the era of instant gratification but damn...probably ought to whoa those expectations down a little.
should have probably did that instead, but i saw the guidelines, and I didn't want to get warned by a mod or admin about it. So I sent it all in PMs instead.

I was looking at this thread by the way

https://www.aaroads.com/forum/index.php?topic=21859.0

I didn't want something like what Ian or rickmastfan said to traffic light guy so that's why i sent it in PMs.

I only posted that message because he brought a fight over here from another forum.  BIG difference.  We don't want to have to babysit people who have an issue with a completely different Admin team from being banned/suspended.  This wasn't our issue.

Also, for future reference, try this site to see if a site is down.  Might tell you it could be just your ISP messing around with your connection at that moment:
http://downforeveryoneorjustme.com/

That way, you don't need to mass spam PMs to people.  This IS NOT Twitter, or Facebook.  We don't have unlimited space like they do for databases (well, I'm not sure exactly how much space the forum gets in the database, only Alex knows, but it's still prudent to not spam it up if we can help it since he pays the bills).  We don't need to have 30 of the same PM hiding in ours with no way to delete them unless the end-users do it themselves.


Quote from: Scott5114 on September 05, 2019, 06:57:53 PM
Consider yourself warned: unsolicited bulk PMs are not permitted.

Also, we can, and will remove the ability to send PMs from you, if we hear from others your doing this again.  We don't like doing that as it's an option of last resort before a full ban (temp or permanent), but we've had to do it once in the past to another user to let them know to stop it.  Please don't make us do it again, as we don't take people abusing that system lightly.


1995hoo

Either way, going back to the original question he raised, nobody is ever required to respond to a PM and it's unreasonable to act as though you think you're entitled to receive a reply, regardless of whether the PM was sent to one user or to a large group.

Edited to add: BTW, I wouldn't normally post a PM publicly because I view that as a bit of a faux pas since, well, it's a private or personal message. But I feel like he's more or less waived that via his comments in this thread, so for those who didn't receive the PM in question and might be wondering, this is the one I got (along with the other people I mentioned before). Don't know whether it's identical to what froggie and others received. My reply is below his message.

Quote from: 1995hoo
Quote from: mrhappy1261
How do you register on Highway Divides? Because every time i hit the register button, i get "This page isn't working". Any suggestions? Thanks.





MrHappy

Sorry, I have no idea what you're talking about–don't know what Highway Divides is.
"You know, you never have a guaranteed spot until you have a spot guaranteed."
—Olaf Kolzig, as quoted in the Washington Times on March 28, 2003,
commenting on the Capitals clinching a playoff spot.

"That sounded stupid, didn't it?"
—Kolzig, to the same reporter a few seconds later.

tolbs17

Quote from: rickmastfan67 on September 05, 2019, 09:05:25 PM

Quote from: Scott5114 on September 05, 2019, 06:57:53 PM
Consider yourself warned: unsolicited bulk PMs are not permitted.

Also, we can, and will remove the ability to send PMs from you, if we hear from others your doing this again.  We don't like doing that as it's an option of last resort before a full ban (temp or permanent), but we've had to do it once in the past to another user to let them know to stop it.  Please don't make us do it again, as we don't take people abusing that system lightly.
Alright, I will stop. I didn't know that there was a rule against that.

jeffandnicole

Quote from: 1995hoo on September 05, 2019, 04:33:56 PM
Quote from: froggie on September 05, 2019, 03:38:25 PM
He may have sent a number of messages about Highway Divides...I received one too.  But I didn't know what it was either.

The one he sent me also lists the following recipients: vdeane, Brandon, roadman65, and jeffandnicole. Easy enough to see what we have in common if you view the member list, though of course you and cpzilliacus (and others) fall within the same general category.

And I didn't even realize I was in that club until I was about 62 posts into that club.  (Would've been in it sooner if I didn't get a promotion at work and actually got a helluva lot more work to worry about! lol)

tolbs17

Quote from: rickmastfan67 on September 05, 2019, 09:05:25 PM
Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:52:08 PM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 05, 2019, 05:42:48 PM
Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:39:18 PM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 05, 2019, 05:36:50 PM
Quote from: mrhappy1261 on September 05, 2019, 05:01:17 PM
Quote from: MNHighwayMan on September 05, 2019, 01:06:53 PM
I'm not sure this is a question I want to ask, but I'm going to ask it anyway. Just how many PMs have you been sending?
like i sent it to 30 users.

And you're wondering why a lot of people didn't want to respond?...spam much?
No, I want to see who would use highway divides. It was apparently down and not a single person has been on that site where I got the answers from. It's called mass messaging.

It's all call spam messaging. Had I noticed you sent out a message to a billion different users I wouldn't have replied either.  Worse, is now you want some sort of justification from everyone who didn't answer.   Maybe a thread would have sufficed since it probably would have left the door open to people who use the site to respond?  I know this is the era of instant gratification but damn...probably ought to whoa those expectations down a little.
should have probably did that instead, but i saw the guidelines, and I didn't want to get warned by a mod or admin about it. So I sent it all in PMs instead.

I was looking at this thread by the way

https://www.aaroads.com/forum/index.php?topic=21859.0

I didn't want something like what Ian or rickmastfan said to traffic light guy so that's why i sent it in PMs.

I only posted that message because he brought a fight over here from another forum.  BIG difference.  We don't want to have to babysit people who have an issue with a completely different Admin team from being banned/suspended.  This wasn't our issue.

Also, for future reference, try this site to see if a site is down.  Might tell you it could be just your ISP messing around with your connection at that moment:
http://downforeveryoneorjustme.com/

That way, you don't need to mass spam PMs to people.  This IS NOT Twitter, or Facebook.  We don't have unlimited space like they do for databases (well, I'm not sure exactly how much space the forum gets in the database, only Alex knows, but it's still prudent to not spam it up if we can help it since he pays the bills).  We don't need to have 30 of the same PM hiding in ours with no way to delete them unless the end-users do it themselves.

That site is not down, it's working right now, I hit register, and it works. Maybe it was down for a little bit when I was asking the question to 30 users. Again, I won't mass spam anyone else unless I have something important to ask someone. I know it may have sounded weird, but I just wanted to see if anyone would find out the reason why that is.

MrHappy

froggie

Quote from: 1995hoo on September 05, 2019, 09:10:52 PM
Either way, going back to the original question he raised, nobody is ever required to respond to a PM and it's unreasonable to act as though you think you're entitled to receive a reply, regardless of whether the PM was sent to one user or to a large group.

Edited to add: BTW, I wouldn't normally post a PM publicly because I view that as a bit of a faux pas since, well, it's a private or personal message. But I feel like he's more or less waived that via his comments in this thread, so for those who didn't receive the PM in question and might be wondering, this is the one I got (along with the other people I mentioned before). Don't know whether it's identical to what froggie and others received. My reply is below his message.

Quote from: 1995hoo
Quote from: mrhappy1261
How do you register on Highway Divides? Because every time i hit the register button, i get "This page isn't working". Any suggestions? Thanks.





MrHappy

Sorry, I have no idea what you're talking about–don't know what Highway Divides is.

Yep.  Same message.

Brandon

Quote from: 1995hoo on September 05, 2019, 09:10:52 PM
Either way, going back to the original question he raised, nobody is ever required to respond to a PM and it's unreasonable to act as though you think you're entitled to receive a reply, regardless of whether the PM was sent to one user or to a large group.

Edited to add: BTW, I wouldn't normally post a PM publicly because I view that as a bit of a faux pas since, well, it's a private or personal message. But I feel like he's more or less waived that via his comments in this thread, so for those who didn't receive the PM in question and might be wondering, this is the one I got (along with the other people I mentioned before). Don't know whether it's identical to what froggie and others received. My reply is below his message.

Quote from: 1995hoo
Quote from: mrhappy1261
How do you register on Highway Divides? Because every time i hit the register button, i get "This page isn't working". Any suggestions? Thanks.





MrHappy

Sorry, I have no idea what you're talking about–don't know what Highway Divides is.

Same message here, and I did not respond as I've never been to Highway Divides.
"If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention." - Ramsay Bolton

"Symbolic of his struggle against reality." - Reg

hbelkins

I also got the message about Highway Divides. I did join it, after learning about it on this forum, but it seems to be a much more focused and less general forum than this one, so I haven't been on it but very rarely.

As for not answering messages, I only reply if I feel like it. That pertains to work as well as personally.  :-D


Government would be tolerable if not for politicians and bureaucrats.

DaBigE

Consider this a preview of the real-world. Just because you send a message does not guarantee (or entitle you) to a response. No one is required to reply to anyone. But who you choose to ignore can have other consequences (court summons, the IRS, ...).

Lack of response happens a lot in the business world. In those cases, you hopefully can then elect to not do business with them any longer. The OP doesn't appear to mention how long they waited...some people also take forever to reply.
"We gotta find this road, it's like Bob's road!" - Rabbit, Twister

ozarkman417

If you want to share photos of yourself to people on this forum, try this: Link a Flickr or Instagram page to your signature, and label it "personal images" or something along that line. That way, only those who are interested will see it.

SM-G965U


tolbs17

Quote from: ozarkman417 on September 06, 2019, 10:47:27 PM
If you want to share photos of yourself to people on this forum, try this: Link a Flickr or Instagram page to your signature, and label it "personal images" or something along that line. That way, only those who are interested will see it.

SM-G965U
Ok, I guess I may as well do that.

roadman65

Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
Every day is a winding road, you just got to get used to it.

Sheryl Crowe

hbelkins

Quote from: DaBigE on September 06, 2019, 10:42:38 PM

Lack of response happens a lot in the business world. In those cases, you hopefully can then elect to not do business with them any longer. The OP doesn't appear to mention how long they waited...some people also take forever to reply.

Ha. I'm used to not getting responses at work for answers to things I need to know in order to do my job!


Government would be tolerable if not for politicians and bureaucrats.

thspfc

Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
He's autistic, if you weren't aware. It can look and sound the same at times.

Max Rockatansky

Quote from: thspfc on September 07, 2019, 04:43:25 PM
Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
He's autistic, if you weren't aware. It can look and sound the same at times.

Has the OP ever brought up his medical history on the forum before?  Seems kind of cheesy to go all speculative on something like that if it wasn't advertised as an open book subject. 

thspfc

Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 07, 2019, 04:51:09 PM
Quote from: thspfc on September 07, 2019, 04:43:25 PM
Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
He's autistic, if you weren't aware. It can look and sound the same at times.

Has the OP ever brought up his medical history on the forum before?  Seems kind of cheesy to go all speculative on something like that if it wasn't advertised as an open book subject.
https://www.aaroads.com/forum/index.php?topic=25400.0

Alps

Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
What the fuck kind of horrible person discusses personal problems in a public forum?

thspfc

Quote from: Alps on September 07, 2019, 06:26:41 PM
Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
What the fuck kind of horrible person discusses personal problems in a public forum?
Jeez, relax. He's just trying to help. I get that it wasn't really something that needed to be posted, but he has good intentions.

NE2

Quote from: Alps on September 07, 2019, 06:26:41 PM
Quote from: roadman65 on September 07, 2019, 11:23:25 AM
Are you on meds at all, if you do not mind me asking?  You sound like you may have depression and you might also want to see your primary doctor to see if you are depressed.

That can make you a bit more sensitive and feel inferior at times.  Believe, me when you feel that way it can make those around you a bit uncomfortable and even loose focus at times.

See your doctor to play safe.
What the fuck kind of horrible person discusses personal problems in a public forum?
I wonder if bboss is naked.
pre-1945 Florida route log

I accept and respect your identity as long as it's not dumb shit like "identifying as a vaccinated attack helicopter".

rickmastfan67




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