Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[I-55]

Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

Why doesn't a spider's web stick to its butt?

[interstatefan990]

Some radar detector detector detectors have radar detector detector detector detectors to avoid being detected by a radar detector detector detector.

Why do noses run and feet smell?

Why do they call it apartments if they’re built together?

Is it called sand because it’s in between sea and land?

If you’re waiting for the waiter, you’re the waiter.

When you buy a bigger bed, you have more bed room but less bedroom.

There are Interstates...that never leave a state.

[hbelkins]

Some radar detector detector detectors have radar detector detector detector detectors to avoid being detected by a radar detector detector detector.

They do? I need one for traveling in Virginia.

[kenarmy]

What if US 101 is supposed to be US 0 and there was an error in documentation? Is that why most of the X0's touched it?
All of us have experienced pregnancy.
If humans could fly, wouldn't it be considered exercising?
When you get a random itch, is it the ghost of bugs you've killed?
Chances are none of you will be aware that I died when I die..
How do you know when you were born? What if it's the wrong certificate?
Why are stay at home moms always gone?
Isn't telling someone that it's unbelievable calling them a liar?
What do you say when an atheist sneezes??
If we only use 10 percent of our brain, how do we know we only use 10 percent???

[Big John]

What do you say when an atheist sneezes??

gesundheit - it roughly means health

[Scott5114]

Why is everyone in this thread posting in italic?

[interstatefan990]

Why is everyone in this thread posting in italic?

Because people are following the lead of the OP, I guess.

[1]

I've seen Wikipedia talk pages where someone forgets a closing tag (italics, bold, color, size... it's usually in their signature), and that makes the entire rest of the page have the same markup.

[kurumi]

"This is shit" => bad  ("Doordash is shit")

"This is the shit" => good  ("KGATLW is the shit")

"This is the shits" => bad again ("That checkin process was the shits")

English is weird

[interstatefan990]

"This is shit" => bad  ("Doordash is shit")

"This is the shit" => good  ("KGATLW is the shit")

"This is the shits" => bad again ("That checkin process was the shits")

English is weird

Yeah, no, yeah = Yeah
No, yeah, no = No
No, yeah = Yeah
Yeah, no = No
Yeah, yeah, yeah = No
No, no, no = Yeah

[kenarmy]

- I told you I was going to update frequently!
- Birthdays are just a reminder that you have one less year to live
- Did you know snails play hide and seek with us when they are touched?
- What's wrong with "W" being double U? It looks like two cursive U's.
- Incorrect is always spelled incorrect
- Why does a pineapple not have a pine or an apple?
- Where do Dentists go if they need an extraction?
- Password is supposed to be a secret, but it means to pass to others.
- Did you notice I used dashes this time, but not last time?
- Does the "k" "a" or "ay" make the "aye" sound?
-Your first birthday was really your second.
- Why is it birthday instead of birthdate?
- You might've visited something for the last time recently..
- Dogs are smarter than us, they know our language, but you don't know it's barks 
- Are these thoughts actually "random" since we have thoughts all the time?
- What if Covid gets erased from history? How is it going to get stopped when we all die?
- You have more ancestors than your ancestors.
- If you don't eat half-popped kernels, wtf are you doing in life?
- If you divide US 6's distance in half, you get US 99's former transcon distance.

[jmacswimmer]

- Why does a pineapple not have a pine or an apple?

I instantly thought of Mike Myers's Linda Richman bit on SNL upon seeing this.

I'm getting a little verklempt! Talk amongst yourselves.  I'll give you yet another topic: chickpeas are neither chick, nor a pea.  DISCUSS!

[Max Rockatansky]

Why does running tend to induce bowel movements?

[interstatefan990]

You can never say “I’m dead” and be correct.

[andrepoiy]

Why are Siamese cats not conjoined?

I believe a Siamese cat refers to the breed of cat from Siam, which is the name Thailand went by before changing its name to Thailand.

[noelbotevera]

"Buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo" is a perfectly valid English sentence
Peanuts are nuts but aren't peas, but peanuts are a vegetable
How do 8 million people live in NYC if the rent is too high?
If God is a god, why does he insist on having his name capitalized?
We are all related to each other

[Scott5114]

You can never say “I’m dead” and be correct.

Unless you're playing a game. Or you're an actor.

[1]

Peanuts are nuts but aren't peas, but peanuts are a vegetable

Peanuts are not nuts.

[zachary_amaryllis]

somewhere, somebody's cat is stalking me

[kenarmy]

The earth will be less beautiful tomorrow
You may have killed insects that are going extinct.
US 62 is shorter than US 40. Idk I just think that's crazy.
plants are really farming us, giving us oxygen until we eventually expire and turn into mulch which they can consume..
Theme parks snap better pictures of you at 70 mph than banks do of robbers.
Lawyers hope you get sued, doctors hope you get sick, cops hope you're criminal, mechanics hope you have car trouble, but only a thief wishes prosperity for you.
Why does 1984-2000 seem longer than 2000-2016?
An "unlimited minutes per month" phone plan really only gives you 44,640 minutes per month at most, it's a scam.
You complain about your laptop charging slow even though it takes you hours. and then you still don't have enough battery.
Why don't we have "The Price is Right" with billionaires?
When the older generations says this generation is terrible, they're really saying they sucked as parents.
*inhale* Almost every hand you've shaken has had a *!çk in it.

[zachary_amaryllis]

*inhale* Almost every hand you've shaken has had a *!çk in it.

that might be the most disturbing random thought on this thread. hats off for raising the bar.

[Max Rockatansky]

*inhale* Almost every hand you've shaken has had a *!çk in it.

that might be the most disturbing random thought on this thread. hats off for raising the bar.

If it makes you feel better all us essentially are just cobbled bacteria and viruses. 

[interstatefan990]

You can never say “I’m dead” and be correct.

Unless you're playing a game. Or you're an actor.

In that case, your character is dead. Not you.

[Max Rockatansky]

You can never say “I’m dead” and be correct.

Unless you're playing a game. Or you're an actor.

In that case, your character is dead. Not you.

Unless you’re a method actor, then all bets are off.

[Big John]

If semi means half, why are the big trucks called semis?