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[Max Rockatansky]

Target in a really bad neighborhood I traversed once upon a time:  Targhetto

What the worst and most lazy person I ever met called Applebee's:  Crapplebee's

[Zeffy]

Massachusetts Institute of Technology -> Horrible current generation teenagers
New York City -> New Fork City

...What?

[slorydn1]

My grampa worked for GM for 40 years, so of course I grew up knowing "Found On Road Dead" and "Fix Or Repair Daily". I've also heard "F*cker Only Runs Downhill", and one that I won't repeat because it's positive for the brand.

You mean First On Race Day. There, I said it for you.

[noelbotevera]

Massachusetts Institute of Technology -> Horrible current generation teenagers
New York City -> New Fork City

...What?

I'm an idiot...those aren't businesses!!

[OracleUsr]

Several:

The Burger King on Battleground in Greensboro, NC, was known at my alma mater as the "BK Lounge"

Not to mention the nicknames of several Harris Teeter stores (Taj Mateeter, Trump Teeter, etc.)

[kkt]

MIT: Miserable Institute of Torment

[jp the roadgeek]

Any school named after JFK: Jail For Kids

[slorydn1]

Several:

The Burger King on Battleground in Greensboro, NC, was known at my alma mater as the "BK Lounge"

Not to mention the nicknames of several Harris Teeter stores (Taj Mateeter, Trump Teeter, etc.)

Or Hairy Tweezer over here in eastern NC.

[catch22]

A good friend of mine refers to "Indiana University - Purdue University at Indianapolis" (IUPUI) as "Ooey Pooey."

[paulthemapguy]

Steak 'n' Shake is called Mistake 'n' Shake.

(old quote is old)

AWESOME!  So I'm not the only one who has made this joke!

McDonald's is Mack Daddy's.  Wendy's is "Freckle-b**ch's", a reference to the Saints Row games.
DSW is "Dick Suck Warehouse."  Wal-Mart is Wallyworld (hardly original).    Chipotle is "Chipottle" (rhymes with bottle).  Applebee's is Crapplebee's.  Taco Bell is Taco Hell (not original either).  Cracker Barrel is Crapper Barrel.  And BP is "bull piss."

[Buck87]

Target in a really bad neighborhood I traversed once upon a time:  Targhetto

I've heard the same for Kroger (Kroghetto)

[noelbotevera]

Using actual business names this time:

Pizza Hut -> Pizza Stuff (it's not even real pizza)
Wendy's -> Weenies (small portions man)
McDonalds -> FuckDonalds (excuse my profane language, but their food is so bad I had to do that)

[hbelkins]

Ford -- F'ing Old Rebuilt Dodge.

[Henry]

Wells Fargo=Wells Farstop
Bank of America=Bank of Amerifraud
BB&T=BS&P

[Zeffy]

Capital One = Crapital None (thanks to how I was treated applying for a basic ass credit card)

[kkt]

Capital One = Crapital None (thanks to how I was treated applying for a basic ass credit card)

They were doing you a favor.  They don't treat their longtime customers any better than applicants no credit history.

[Henry]

Capital One = Crapital None (thanks to how I was treated applying for a basic ass credit card)

They were doing you a favor.  They don't treat their longtime customers any better than applicants no credit history.

Totally forgot about that one!

[slorydn1]

Oh and how did we forget those college degrees (for those who have passed a scientific course of study):

Bull Shit
More Shit
Piled higher and Deeper

[cl94]

Alright, some New York ones:

-Price Chopper: Ghetto Chopper.  A Google Maps search for "ghetto chopper" brings you to the one on Delaware Avenue in Albany.
-New Way Lunch (hot dog place in Glens Falls/Queensbury/Lake George): Dirty John's. Hot dogs are referred to as "dirt dogs" by locals.
-Hot Dog Charlie's and Famous Lunch (Troy/Capital District): I've heard it referred to as "hairy arms" from how hot dogs used to be lined up one's arms to put sauce on
-Six Flags Great Escape: Storyland (name before the company that is now Six Flags bought it)
-BW3: Buffalo Wild Wings. Used to be "...and Weck", hence the "W3"
-Walmart: "Smallmart" for small locations in Buffalo, specifically the Lancaster Supercenter that is smaller than a typical non-Supercenter location.
-First Niagara Center: F'N Center
-Cumberland Farms: Cumbies

[Zeffy]

Capital One = Crapital None (thanks to how I was treated applying for a basic ass credit card)

They were doing you a favor.  They don't treat their longtime customers any better than applicants no credit history.

Which is unfortunate, because the reviews for almost all of their credit cards were at least 4 1/4 stars or higher... I went to US Bank instead and they accommodated me nicely.

[Rothman]

-Six Flags Great Escape: Storyland (name before the company that is now Six Flags bought it)

I believe there was a period where it was just The Great Escape (after Storyland, before Six Flags).  I visited it for the first time during that period.  Had a green coaster out front with a few inversions.  Forget what it was called (I don't believe it's still there).

[jp the roadgeek]

-Six Flags Great Escape: Storyland (name before the company that is now Six Flags bought it)

I believe there was a period where it was just The Great Escape (after Storyland, before Six Flags).  I visited it for the first time during that period.  Had a green coaster out front with a few inversions.  Forget what it was called (I don't believe it's still there).

The Steamin Demon I think it was called. My dad rode it, but I was only 8 and I didn't.  Used to go there when I was a kid and The Great Escape name was still new.

BTW, I still call Six Flags New England Riverside Park.

[noelbotevera]

Hersheypark -> Adverts Park (basically a large advertisement scheme to get people to love Hershey's chocolate. Propaganda is all over the place. great roller coasters and park overall though)

[cl94]

-Six Flags Great Escape: Storyland (name before the company that is now Six Flags bought it)

I believe there was a period where it was just The Great Escape (after Storyland, before Six Flags).  I visited it for the first time during that period.  Had a green coaster out front with a few inversions.  Forget what it was called (I don't believe it's still there).

The Steamin Demon I think it was called. My dad rode it, but I was only 8 and I didn't.  Used to go there when I was a kid and The Great Escape name was still new.

It was for a while. Many locals (as in Warren County) still called it Storyland. We had season passes when I lived 5 minutes away. Went there a couple nights a week during the summer. This was well before they started charging for parking.

Speaking of Steamin Demon, it's so lame that Six Flags is trying to spice it up with a name change and a "virtual reality experience". Yeah...

[TheHighwayMan394]

On the note of theme park name changes:

Nickelodeon Universe (Mall of America) -> Camp Snoopy (before the agreement was not renewed between the mall and Cedar Fair). Another local amusement park, Valleyfair later contracted to have some Peanuts-themed attractions at their park.

Some guy from Philadelphia on another board corrected me for calling it Camp Snoopy after the rebrand. I wanted to reach through the computer and slap him.