Names other than the actual one for a business you have worked for or patronize

[1995hoo]

I'd forgotten about this one since their restaurants around here closed within the past few years: Ruddfuckers (I suppose it could be construed as a sort of spoonerism, but I've always heard it said intentionally).

I have the hockey game on TV now. The opponent? The Pittsburgh Penis (derived from their fans' use of "Pens"). They share a state with a baseball team, the Philthies.

In a similar vein, I've heard Maryland's teams referred to as the Twerps and the Turds and the school itself referred to as Fairyland or College Spark (the latter referring to their peculiar habit, shared with WVU, of burning couches and the like after big basketball wins).

[mhh]

Based on personal experience I refer to Best Buy as Worst Customer Service.

[english si]

Some, though I'm drawing some blanks as many shops and sports teams officially adopt the nicknames they get called. I'm going to ignore abbreviations (eg "Maccy D's", "'spoons", "Marks & Sparks", etc) There needs to be some sort of negative vibe from it for them not to.

"Chelski" for Chelsea FC, reflecting their Russian money.

"Primarni" for Primark (which is meant to be pronounced pri-mark, but everyone pronounces prim-ark), the super cheap clothing chain, making it up-market sounding by merging it with Armani

"SleasyJet" for EasyJet, a low cost airline (other, spin-off, brands get the same treatment).

"Worst Group" or "Last Group" for First Group, who run buses, trains, etc with First <name of franchise/area where buses run>. eg Worst Capital Connect, Last Great Western Trains...

The long names of railways gave them lots of nicknames from the initials (never good ones), but those companies are long defunct.

"Kentucky Fried Cat" for KFC

Newspapers:
"The Gaurinaud" for The Guardian. As it was printed in Manchester, the typos of earlier editions were sent to London, whereas other papers were the other way around, and so Londoners only got frequent typos in that paper.

"The Torygraph" for The Telegraph, as it is a vocal supporter of the Conservative Party.

"The Daily Wail" for The Daily Mail, as it constantly scaremongering.

"The Why" for The i[/url], a paper aimed at the Buzzfeed crowd, consisting of a shortened version containing the most clickbaity articles from The Independent: a misnamed paper (I guess it isn't partisan, though gone are the token editorials that disagree with the main editorial stance that it used to have) that is the leftist snobby version of the Wail: alarmist, superior, incredibly biased. Somehow it sells enough to not be so embarrassingly loss making that the parent company has to pull the paper, but not enough to be on people's radar enough that the nickname is ever used (I'm sure I've seen someone else use it and didn't just make it up).

[kurumi]

I like to call the NY Yankees the Stankees as I am a die hard Met fan.

Which Met?

Maybe the manager, Terry Collin.

[GCrites]

"Chelski" for Chelsea FC, reflecting their Russian money.

Similarly, the "New York Nyets" for Nets

[US 41]

Unfortunately my favorite NFL Team often gets called the "Bungals" rather than Bengals.

[iowahighways]

The infamous Kum & Go (C-store chain in the Midwest) = "Ejaculate & Evacuate"

[mhh]

Detroit teams when they're not doing well:  The Dead Things (hockey) and the Dyin's (football).  Nothing comes to mind for the Tigers, except sometimes I've heard the Pussy Cats.  I can just imagine what they might call the Pistons.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YOZlD9VByMU

[DandyDan]

The infamous Kum & Go (C-store chain in the Midwest) = "Ejaculate & Evacuate"

I have a buddy who used to work for them and he always called them "Kame and Went", apparently because of high employee turnover ("They came and they went").

[SSOWorld]

Unfortunately my favorite NFL Team often gets called the "Bungals" rather than Bengals.

List of the popular ones:
* Colts ==> Dolts
* Buccaneers ==> Yuckaneers (I'll echo that for the Milwaukee NBA team)
* Titans -- mispronounce and you "get crap past the radar"
* DA BEARS
* Vikings ==> Viqueens
* I've seen Lie-Downs for the Lions - and it's the truth - who else has led for the whole game and lost?
* Ravens (according to a broadcaster) - The Recycled Browns - in fact I've heard a team that moved and had its name changed be called the Recycled <insert old team name here>

Off the subject of sports to gas stations:
* I'd like to call Kwik Trip the "Self-Serve Gas Verification store" since the clerks have to verify if you have purchased fuel.  Due to their [lack of] enthusiasm, their question becomes "any gas out there?" -- cue sarcastic (often rude) responses.

[halork]

Burger King = Beaker's
TCF Bank = Tasty Chicken Feet or TLA Bank
Wells Fargo = Smells Fargo
King Sooper's = King Stupid's

Then the combination fast-food locations make for all sorts of fun:
KFC&W, Long John Silver Bells,  Pizza Bell, Taco Hut, Long John Sanders, etc.

[spooky]

* Ravens (according to a broadcaster) - The Recycled Browns - in fact I've heard a team that moved and had its name changed be called the Recycled <insert old team name here>

I refer to the Ravens as the Purple Browns. The NFL did a good job of retconning that whole relocation/expansion, although it bothers my sense of historical accuracy.

[CNGL-Leudimin]

I actually transliterate several social networks into Spanish: Twitter becomes 'Tuiter', Whatsapp becomes 'Guasap' and Facebook would be 'Feisbuk' if I had not adopted Fakebook as I mentioned earlier.

[slorydn1]

For us (my wife and I):

Burger King=Booger Queen
Taco Bell=Taco Hell
Pizza Hut=Pizza Slut, or the Slut for short
NBC=Nothing But Commercials (long time NASCAR fans can relate)
Fox News=Faux News
CNN=Communist News Network
Any convenience store with Stop 'n Shop in the name= ____________ Stop 'n Rob

and most importantly, although not a business or entity, but an automobile, as a Mustang owner I feel it's germaine:

Chevy Slowmaro (I kid because I care!)

[PHLBOS]

Note: some of these I've heard, not actually worked for nor patronized.

McDonalds => McDog Food (from a friend of my brother's)

McDonalds => the Scottish restaurant (from my father)

Johnson & Wales College/University => Johnson & Jails (from a friend that transferred from there)

Roger Williams (then College, now University) => Roger Dodger Day Care Center (this one dates back to the Vietnam War era)

First Union Bank/Center/Spectrum => F.U. moniker

UMass => ZooMass

Harvard University => "The Massachusetts Institute for Snobbery" - Capt. B.F. "Hawkeye" Pierce (Alan Alda)

Philadelphia Eagles => Philadelphia Beagles (front cover on Philadelphia Daily News several years ago)

Dallas Cowboys => Dallas Cowgirls

New England Patriots => New England Fakeriots (my brother used this one back during the Steve Grogan era)

Ford Fairmont => Ford Poor-mont (from my brother)

If the China Sails restaurant in Salem, MA were still around; I'm sure somebody who had poor service would call it China Fails.

US Airways => Useless Airways or Scareways

Northwest Airlines => Northworst Airlines

AirTran => Air Trash

Allegheny Airlines => Agony Airlines (real old one here)

Northeast Airlines => Yellowbird (really old one)

Southwest Airlines => Greyhound of the sky (at least from the 80s to early 2000s)

Eveready (batteries) => Neveready (1973 Wacky-Packages parody)

Dave & Buster's => Kiddie Casino (at least that's what I think of it as)

Sky Chefs (airline catering company) => Sky Thieves (this one's been around since the late 50s)

[Bruce]

The Seattle Times = The Suburban Times, because it shows bias against urbanist ideals (e.g. endorsing no votes on mass transit)

[roadman]

Northeast Airlines => Yellowbird (really old one)

Yellowbird was actually used in a marketing campaign by Northeast (Yellowbird - we make your vacation fun.  Yellowbird - our service is number one!).

[PHLBOS]

Northeast Airlines => Yellowbird (really old one)

Yellowbird was actually used in a marketing campaign by Northeast (Yellowbird - we make your vacation fun.  Yellowbird - our service is number one!).

Their final color/livery scheme just prior to its merging with Delta actually featured YELLOWBIRD lettering underneath the NE logo on the vertical tailfin.

[Pete from Boston]

On the subject of travel, the brand name of the train that takes five hours to get from Boston to Albany on a good day is not-so-fondly known as the Late Shore Limited.

[US71]

UALR: University of Arkansas- Little Rock
"University of Arkansas- Last Resort

UAFS: University of Arkansas-Fort Smith
"U-fiss"

[hm insulators]

Many years ago my brother used to call Jack in the Box "biscuit in the bag." I call it "Crap in the Box," while years ago a schoolmate called it "Junk in the Box."

I call Facebook "Farcebook."

[Buck87]

Pizza Rut

Value Shitty Furniture

PeeNC Bank

Shittsburgh Squealers

[roadman65]

I used to like the old Ford Motor Car acronym that was used in the 80's: Found On The Road Dead.  Then my cousin once came up with Fix Or Repair Daily. Back in the late 80's Ford cars were not too good in the dependability department, hence the rise in Nissan and Toyota sales of that decade.
 
For the NY Yankees to me will always be the Stankees.

[Pete from Boston]

I used to like the old Ford Motor Car acronym that was used in the 80's: Found On The Road Dead.  Then my cousin once came up with Fix Or Repair Daily.

This recalls FIAT's reputation for not standing for "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino," but rather "Fix It Again, Tony."

[vtk]

My grampa worked for GM for 40 years, so of course I grew up knowing "Found On Road Dead" and "Fix Or Repair Daily". I've also heard "F*cker Only Runs Downhill", and one that I won't repeat because it's positive for the brand.