Let’s see what puns you have for this story!

Started by 1995hoo, September 18, 2022, 08:32:19 AM

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1995hoo

"You know, you never have a guaranteed spot until you have a spot guaranteed."
—Olaf Kolzig, as quoted in the Washington Times on March 28, 2003,
commenting on the Capitals clinching a playoff spot.

"That sounded stupid, didn't it?"
—Kolzig, to the same reporter a few seconds later.


Takumi

The article seems to not have any self awareness about the truck having "lost its load" .
Quote from: Rothman on July 15, 2021, 07:52:59 AM
Olive Garden must be stopped.  I must stop them.

Don't @ me. Seriously.

jeffandnicole

"The bizarre accident resulted in an awkward exchange between KWTV's anchor Lacey Lowery and the station's helicopter pilot Jim Gardner."

Isn't this frowned upon during working hours? Did either of them contact HR?

formulanone


Max Rockatansky


Big John


kurumi

My first SF/horror short story collection is available: "Young Man, Open Your Winter Eye"

Scott5114

Quote from: Takumi on September 18, 2022, 09:16:20 AM
The article seems to not have any self awareness about the truck having "lost its load" .

Quote from: jeffandnicole on September 18, 2022, 09:40:50 AM
"The bizarre accident resulted in an awkward exchange between KWTV's anchor Lacey Lowery and the station's helicopter pilot Jim Gardner."

Isn't this frowned upon during working hours? Did either of them contact HR?

I mean, Jim Gardner saying shit without thinking isn't exactly newsworthy at this point (he got into some hot water in 2020 over some gut-reaction-at-best/disinformation-at-worst remarks during the Oklahoma City BLM protests).
uncontrollable freak sardine salad chef

NWI_Irish96

Despite claims to the contrary, the size of that spill did matter.
Indiana: counties 100%, highways 100%
Illinois: counties 100%, highways 61%
Michigan: counties 100%, highways 56%
Wisconsin: counties 86%, highways 23%

hbelkins



Government would be tolerable if not for politicians and bureaucrats.

kphoger

Michael R., who was in his front yard nearby at the time of the incident, said he heard a loud bang.

Debra H., whose vehicle was struck by the overturned truck, reportedly received minor injuries but is otherwise OK.  The Oklahoma Highway Safety Office said on partner station WXYZ:  "Make no mistake, [Debra's] life was saved because she was properly buckled up.  So let me just put in a plug for our department's ongoing special seatbelt enforcement program."

And this one is verbatim from the article itself:
QuoteThere is a lot of stuff to clean up.
Keep right except to pass.  Yes.  You.
Visit scenic Orleans County, NY!
Male pronouns, please.

Quote from: Philip K. DickIf you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use them.

Road Hog

If the cargo'd had a strap on, it would've been OK.

Henry

Go Cubs Go! Go Cubs Go! Hey Chicago, what do you say? The Cubs are gonna win today!

TheHighwayMan3561

self-certified as the dumbest person on this board for 5 years running

JayhawkCO


1995hoo

"You know, you never have a guaranteed spot until you have a spot guaranteed."
—Olaf Kolzig, as quoted in the Washington Times on March 28, 2003,
commenting on the Capitals clinching a playoff spot.

"That sounded stupid, didn't it?"
—Kolzig, to the same reporter a few seconds later.

ErmineNotyours

Reminds me of the time someone reported finding a finger in Wendy's chili.  The normally serious CBS Radio News hourly broadcast said that one party was "pointing the finger" of blame at the other, while the police were still looking for "tips".



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