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National Boards => General Highway Talk => Topic started by: bessertc on March 20, 2019, 10:18:55 PM

Title: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: bessertc on March 20, 2019, 10:18:55 PM
Hey All,

A dear friend of mine will be moderating a meeting consisting of a lot of "big-wigs" from the Michigan DOT and the FHWA Michigan Division office and would like some transportation- or highway-related jokes or other humor as ice-breakers to use here and there throughout the day-long meeting. I was also asked to prepare a list of 10 fun/interesting trivia questions about Michigan's highways, but I've got that covered. I'm a bit stumped, though, on transportation- or highway-related jokes, preferably somehow related to Michigan, but general highway humor would be fine, too. I'm hoping you guys can help me with that part. Any contributions are welcome!!

Thanks in advance,
Chris

--
Christopher J Bessert
chris.bessert@gmail.com
www.michiganhighways.org (http://www.michiganhighways.org)
Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: Max Rockatansky on March 20, 2019, 10:21:10 PM
Heh...Pure Pot Holes comes to mind but that might hit too close to home. 
Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: renegade on March 20, 2019, 10:25:53 PM
Fix the damn roads!
Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: Big John on March 20, 2019, 10:31:50 PM
Why is my body out of place?

I Michigan Left my heart in San Francisco :spin:
Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: Beltway on March 20, 2019, 10:44:37 PM
Back when I worked for PennDOT in the 1970s, I heard a PennDOT anecdote from one of their maintenance engineers.  There was a statewide meeting of PennDOT maintenance engineers in Harrisburg, and there was a forum where different ones could speak and discuss their local problems.  One of the St. Davids District 6-0 (Philadelphia and the four surrounding counties) engineers was speaking, and a loud voice interrupted him, someone from western Pennsylvania, and said, "As far as I'm concerned, we ought to build a fence around District 6-0, and give the whole thing to New Jersey!"  This is a true story, and I think it showed the attitude toward Philadelphia that existed in other parts of the state. 

Has it changed since then?  Would New Jersey have taken the offer?
Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: hbelkins on March 21, 2019, 11:47:50 AM
True story -- there's a group of musicians that consists of KYTC employees and some consultants/contractors that play at the annual ACEC-KY/FHWA/KYTC Partnering Conference. Their name is "Phil 'n' the Potholes." If you can work that into the presentation, feel free.

Title: Re: Help! Transportation Humor Needed!
Post by: skluth on March 21, 2019, 07:17:53 PM
An old man is driving on the highway.
His wife calls him on his cell phone and in a worried voice says, "George, be careful!
I just heard on the radio that there was a madman driving the wrong way on I-75!"
George says, "I know, honey. But there isn't just one. There are hundreds!"