Okay, let's touch base here, get on the same page and bring to the table a new paradigm. We need to work as a team here to move forward and leverage this into a deliverable! If we want to move the needle and get on the road to success, we'll have to think outside the box. We have issues here!
Anybody have one of those nutty supervisors who just loves to use buzzwords or other blibber-blubber of that nature? I'm sure you have other "managementspeak" to post here.
(Incidentally, anybody ever notice the more a supervisor or boss spouts off about "teamwork," the less of a team player that person is?)
At the end of the day, it is what it is.
(https://www.aaroads.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.docstoccdn.com%2Fthumb%2Forig%2F21642119.png&hash=fe641b46d3557ee3a38afd47a703e7e5860cf449)
:sombrero:
Thanks, I just spit coffee all over myself when I read this. :-D
I had a few bosses like that when I worked at Domino's back in the day. Yeah the harping on teamwork part was code for "get your shit together so that I don't have to jump in and help to get this done".
In my current job as a shift supervisor of a 911 center we always work as a team, we have to just to get through the day. It's never mentioned, it just happens. Of course, I was blessed with a good crew, that helps a lot too.
Worst on my list, at least in recent memory: "200% accountable." Intended to convey that I am fully accountable for everything I do, and somehow also I'm accountable for everything my colleagues do.
I physically cannot stop my eyes from rolling every time this one gets said, ahem - verbalized.
"The cold blooded murder of the English tongue." Shaw
Shortly after I took a job with the agency formerly known as the Kentucky Revenue Cabinet back in 1995, the regional daily newspaper started running "Dilbert." I heard a lot of terms that I ended up seeing in conversations in "Dilbert." I made the remark more than once that I felt like I was working in Dilbert's office.
One word I hate with a passion is "deliverable."
Jeez, I never say anything like that despite being "management" and having an MBA. Sometimes I say "knowledge base" but that's out of respect to others.
"You've let the organization down"
"We don't play games here"
"Team player"
"Core competencies"
"Cross training"
"ilities" (serviceability, maintainability, supportability, etc.)
"Enriched management"
"Continuous Improvement"
"System Status Review*"
"Bargaining unit concerns"
"Therapeutic slap"
"Management diffusion"
"Distribulate"
"Nothing stays the same, you're either getting better or you're worse"
"Ethics and Compliance Training"
*I have a coffee mug somewhere with "System status review" on it
About 10 years ago everyone was asked by my boss to put some sort of motivational or inspirational quote on their email signature. Being the callus heathen that I am mine was the following:
"Once bread becomes toast it can never go back to being bread."
Now I thought for sure that I was going to get reamed for what I put since I stole it from an episode of Spin City where Micheal J Fox's character said that while high on something. Apparently it was took as deep and meaningful when it was just complete nonsense. :-D
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on June 04, 2016, 12:08:48 AM
About 10 years ago everyone was asked by my boss to put some sort of motivational or inspirational quote on their email signature.
I got no such request when I was working, but did make a point of making my office PC's screensaver extremely disinspirational, a marquee (all swiped from other peoples' .sig files) of
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines!
Always pillage BEFORE you burn!
Friends help you move. REAL friends help you move bodies.
I also had in my office the current year's Despair.com calendar, dedicated to mocking management-speak like discussed above.
Until the years before my retirement, I didn't experience a lot of that kind of management-speak (its increasing use helped me decide to retire at first opportunity). Then again, as antitrust lawyers, we had a lot of our own specialized jargon, some of which we could have fun with.
Quote from: PHLBOS on June 03, 2016, 05:25:10 PM
(https://www.aaroads.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.docstoccdn.com%2Fthumb%2Forig%2F21642119.png&hash=fe641b46d3557ee3a38afd47a703e7e5860cf449)
:sombrero:
I'm going to use this next week tracking certain people. I have a feeling it won't take very long...
The older I get, the more I realize most of America is middle-management d-bags criticizing the people below them and bitching about the people above them.
I was almost going to post that I never hear any of those phrases at my work (all of my company's management clear up to the owner used to be a blue-collar field techs themselves), but then I read 'It is what it is.' I hear that one all the time! It's code for 'What am I supposed to do about it? Meeting over.' Whenever I overhear it (but not personally a part of the discussion), I reply, 'No, it ISN'T what it is, despite what people keep saying.'
"It is what it is" isn't just corporate jargon. I hear it everywhere in description of a myriad of situations.
We had one boss that we tracked the number of times he said "Um". Best part - he was a lawyer. Never saw a courtroom, thank goodness.
Quote from: hbelkins on June 05, 2016, 02:58:31 PM
"It is what it is" isn't just corporate jargon. I hear it everywhere in description of a myriad of situations.
"It is what it is"? Everyone's saying that now. You know what it means? You're screwed, and you shall remain screwed. -- from St. Vincent
Or, when a coworker tries doing things themselves, suddenly whines "But I thought we were supposed to work as a team" to others in the section when this particular coworker gets in trouble for something that he/she did.
Quote from: hbelkins on June 05, 2016, 02:58:31 PM
"It is what it is" isn't just corporate jargon. I hear it everywhere in description of a myriad of situations.
Worst. Phrase. Ever.
Basically, it means "I fucked up, but I'm not going to tell everyone I fucked up, nor will I apologize for what I fucked up. You're just going to have to deal with it."
I worked for a guy who was in charge of a useless initiative, but he was very happy about being in charge of it. He'd set up meetings with all sorts of people and would start these meetings by saying something very similar to "This is an exciting effort because it's both top-down and bottom-up, evolving and even iterative."
He quickly became the butt of many jokes and retired shortly thereafter.
So tired of people TOUCHING BASE.
Quote from: GaryV on June 05, 2016, 04:03:05 PM
We had one boss that we tracked the number of times he said "Um". Best part - he was a lawyer. Never saw a courtroom, thank goodness.
People like that need to join Toastmasters
At the end of the day, I'll take an action item to review this. Perhaps we can leverage some synergies.
I hate the overuse of "at the end of the day." Just say something like "in the end," or "when you get down to it." And when did "leverage" become a verb?
Quote from: Rothman on June 08, 2016, 02:10:31 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on June 05, 2016, 02:58:31 PM
"It is what it is" isn't just corporate jargon. I hear it everywhere in description of a myriad of situations.
"It is what it is"? Everyone's saying that now. You know what it means? You're screwed, and you shall remain screwed. -- from St. Vincent
"It is what it is" also means: "We aren't in the industry of changing all things to please a singular client, because that is a waste of our time."
Being in IT means that you need to use the word "bandwidth", and "knowledge base" seems to be a good way to describe the massive collection of PDFs, handouts, catalogs, videos, defects, known issues, latest improvements/updates, workarounds, lists, and technical know-how...a good thing there's a search engine for that.
But I'd say about half those phrases are uttered by upper brass in our monthly conference calls. It depends on the presenter, some are less formal than others.
Quote from: sbeaver44 on June 04, 2016, 10:18:05 AM
Quote from: PHLBOS on June 03, 2016, 05:25:10 PM
(https://www.aaroads.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.docstoccdn.com%2Fthumb%2Forig%2F21642119.png&hash=fe641b46d3557ee3a38afd47a703e7e5860cf449)
:sombrero:
I'm going to use this next week tracking certain people. I have a feeling it won't take very long...
I was noticing that three of my buzzwords in my original post are in Buzzword Bingo and this is the first time I'd actually seen it pictured.
What does a self-important pompous supervisor think when he lets loose with a phrase and half the captive audience yells "Bingo!"?
^He probably thinks they're agreeing with him!
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
I'm so glad I'm a factory worker. If I had to hear any of that crap, well, I'd prolly go work in a factory.
Quote from: 8.Lug on June 10, 2016, 01:08:28 AM
I'm so glad I'm a factory worker. If I had to hear any of that crap, well, I'd prolly go work in a factory.
Sounds like a "bargaining unit concern" to me.
:bigass:
Quote from: paulthemapguy on June 10, 2016, 12:01:21 AM
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
...
Try a business, or profession for that matter, that is suffering from Acronym and Abbreviation overload (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AcronymAndAbbreviationOverload).
Quote from: SSOWorld on June 12, 2016, 02:59:41 PM
Quote from: paulthemapguy on June 10, 2016, 12:01:21 AM
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
...
Try a business, or profession for that matter, that is suffering from Acronym and Abbreviation overload (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AcronymAndAbbreviationOverload).
UGBFK me!
Quote from: SSOWorld on June 12, 2016, 02:59:41 PM
Quote from: paulthemapguy on June 10, 2016, 12:01:21 AM
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
...
Try a business, or profession for that matter, that is suffering from Acronym and Abbreviation overload (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AcronymAndAbbreviationOverload).
Yeahhhhh...If you could get those TPS reports on my desk by the end of the day, that'd be greeeeeaaat
I'd really like to see "impactful" die. While there is some debate on whether or not it's a word, I maintain that it's NOT a word. But to appease those who swear it's a word, I say it's what my high school English teacher would call a lazy word... "I'm too lazy to come up with an actual word, so I'll make one up."
Quote from: busman_49 on June 13, 2016, 10:51:13 AM
I'd really like to see "impactful" die. While there is some debate on whether or not it's a word, I maintain that it's NOT a word. But to appease those who swear it's a word, I say it's what my high school English teacher would call a lazy word... "I'm too lazy to come up with an actual word, so I'll make one up."
Isn't that like half the terms used for road and highway stuff?? :bigass:
Quote from: slorydn1 on June 13, 2016, 03:46:27 AM
Quote from: SSOWorld on June 12, 2016, 02:59:41 PM
Quote from: paulthemapguy on June 10, 2016, 12:01:21 AM
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
...
Try a business, or profession for that matter, that is suffering from Acronym and Abbreviation overload (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AcronymAndAbbreviationOverload).
UGBFK me!
WTF? YGTBFKM!
Quote from: jeffandnicole on June 13, 2016, 11:42:53 AM
Quote from: busman_49 on June 13, 2016, 10:51:13 AM
I'd really like to see "impactful" die. While there is some debate on whether or not it's a word, I maintain that it's NOT a word. But to appease those who swear it's a word, I say it's what my high school English teacher would call a lazy word... "I'm too lazy to come up with an actual word, so I'll make one up."
Isn't that like half the terms used for road and highway stuff?? :bigass:
If a roadgeek term sounds funny I just ask an engineer. Ones that haven't been around roadgeeking usually find our unique terms funny, but others make some roll their eyes -- like BGS.
Quote from: GCrites80s on June 13, 2016, 08:44:37 PM
Quote from: jeffandnicole on June 13, 2016, 11:42:53 AM
Quote from: busman_49 on June 13, 2016, 10:51:13 AM
I'd really like to see "impactful" die. While there is some debate on whether or not it's a word, I maintain that it's NOT a word. But to appease those who swear it's a word, I say it's what my high school English teacher would call a lazy word... "I'm too lazy to come up with an actual word, so I'll make one up."
Isn't that like half the terms used for road and highway stuff?? :bigass:
If a roadgeek term sounds funny I just ask an engineer. Ones that haven't been around roadgeeking usually find our unique terms funny, but others make some roll their eyes -- like BGS.
Very true. I've been calling them BGS's for so long I have honestly forgotten what they are really called (Slo grabs the dunce cap and puts his face in the corner).
Quote from: paulthemapguy on June 10, 2016, 12:01:21 AM
All of you in this thread absolutely need to hear this song.
Funny! :-D :clap:
Quote from: slorydn1 on June 17, 2016, 11:57:13 AM
Very true. I've been calling them BGS's for so long I have honestly forgotten what they are really called (Slo grabs the dunce cap and puts his face in the corner).
They're called "panel signs" in my office.
Quote from: hbelkins on June 18, 2016, 01:52:51 PM
Quote from: slorydn1 on June 17, 2016, 11:57:13 AM
Very true. I've been calling them BGS's for so long I have honestly forgotten what they are really called (Slo grabs the dunce cap and puts his face in the corner).
They're called "panel signs" in my office.
[offtopic]
My bridge engineer friend gets a kick out of "BGS" and brings it up specifically with any of his peers when he mentions the existence of amateur roadgeeks.
[/offtopic]
I don't have to deal with managementspeak. Instead, I have a manager who has extraordinarily bad writing skills. Most of the time this is simply funny, like when he consistently refers to ideas as "ideals".
Other times, though, it gets to the point where he will send out a department-wide email that outright confuses everyone to the point that it becomes water cooler gossip as to what point he was actually trying to convey. The most famous incident was when he sent out an email reading in its entirety "Do not remove draw flaps at any time". Nobody had any idea what a draw flap was, and an entire shift went by before someone was able to decipher the meaning and sent out a reply-to-all explaining that a "draw flap" was the boss's term for the little liftable brackets that hold the bills in place in a cash register drawer insert. Most recently, he replied to a department-wide email asking "If a customer refuses to provide a phone number, do we cancel the transaction or complete it anyway?" with only the word "Yes".
They have hired an assistant for him, and part of her unofficial duties involve playing oracle and providing the official interpretation for his emails!
I've probably mentioned this before, but I had a manager several jobs ago who was begged by the entire department to PLEASE assign priorities to all the pending work in the department as it seemed no matter what we worked on, he always was upset that we hadn't worked on something else.
So, eventually, he did generate a list of priorities of all the jobs we were working on.
Everything was #1 priority except for one project that was priority #6.
It really didn't help the work flow any, but it did help everyone working in his area that he was a total idiot.
And then I had another boss (at another company) who sent all his underlings to a computer training class (for a whole week!) for a computer system he had no budget to acquire. How these cretins get in management, and then are impossible to get rid of remains a mystery to me.
Quote from: Jardine on June 19, 2016, 10:33:13 AM
How these cretins get in management, and then are impossible to get rid of remains a mystery to me.
Scott Adams explained it in the Dilbert Principle (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dilbert_principle):
The most incompetent employees are promoted to middle-management positions so they'll do the least damage. (paraphrasing it a bit here, but you get the idea)
"Doing More With Less". What a crock of shit. Less equals less, never more.
Quote from: freebrickproductions on June 19, 2016, 11:59:06 AM
Quote from: Jardine on June 19, 2016, 10:33:13 AM
How these cretins get in management, and then are impossible to get rid of remains a mystery to me.
Scott Adams explained it in the Dilbert Principle (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dilbert_principle): The most incompetent employees are promoted to middle-management positions so they'll do the least damage. (paraphrasing it a bit here, but you get the idea)
Got one of those, but he's been promoted above his pay grade and is actually causing damage. Wish our boss would see it instead of praising how good he is.
Quote from: Brandon on June 19, 2016, 05:38:00 PMGot one of those, but he's been promoted above his pay grade and is actually causing damage.
The Peter Principle (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_principle) holds that people are promoted to the level of their incompetence.
Someone at work today used "touch base" 6 or 7 times in a 5 minute phone call! That seems to me the most common "managementspeak" at my office.
For some reason I'm hearing "boots on the ground" a lot lately...you'd swear that it was an active duty combat zone. I think someone got it out of one those stupid motivation self help books.
Quote from: 8.Lug on June 10, 2016, 01:08:28 AM
I'm so glad I'm a factory worker. If I had to hear any of that crap, well, I'd prolly go work in a factory.
I heard all that bullshit when I worked in a factory!
Quote from: renegade on August 04, 2016, 08:26:14 PM
Quote from: 8.Lug on June 10, 2016, 01:08:28 AM
I'm so glad I'm a factory worker. If I had to hear any of that crap, well, I'd prolly go work in a factory.
I heard all that bullshit when I worked in a factory!
I actually heard more management speak when I worked in a warehouse than the office I work at now. You can't escape it even in a blue collar job.
"Due diligence" "rightsize" and a point for any time anyone uses a stupid acronym
Back at the end of 2008, the logistics company I was working for (since early '03) was acquired by another firm after the original owner (the guy who hired me!) had major surgery and decided to retire & sell the company. The new owner, whose existing business revolved around same-day courier service, started visiting all the branches with some of his company's upper management -- none of whom had ever worked in the logistics field. They got to the branch I managed, in Ontario, the first week of 2009 -- and the corporate cliches just popped out of their mouths nonstop! The bullshit was relentless -- such questions as "Where do you envision yourself within our corporate strategy?" or "We appreciate all the effort you've put into getting this branch to run smoothly, but we're reevaluating the whole concept of non-centralized branch operation". At that time, I started implementing an exit strategy. By March 2009 all my staff -- except one delivery coordinator -- had been reassigned out of the office into either the new company HQ or the field; by May all the original HQ management had left or been demoted, and the branch managers replaced by the new owners' more senior courier drivers or dispatchers. New owner was, in essence, cleaning house of pretty much every significant employee of my original firm. Luckily, I had managed to get a Census Bureau supervisorial position in hand (I held a similar position in 1989-90 during my early grad school years), so when the axe fell on me over the Memorial Day weekend, I only had 2 weeks of "downtime" (helped by 27 days of accumulated vacation pay!) before starting the C.B. job. Of course, working for the Bureau brought with it its own particular form of "management-speak", but at least it was familiar enough to functionally ignore!
I received notice in mid-2010 that my former employer had filed Chapter 11 bankruptcy, and that I was included in a class-action lawsuit claiming widespread wrongful termination, an action taken by my former immediate supervisor. Two years later I got a check for a whopping $975, accompanied by a notification that Chapter 11 had turned into Chapter 7! I almost showed up at the HQ liquidation sale with check in hand to see if I could get one of their Nikon printers dirt cheap, but decided it wasn't worth the gas to drive from Hesperia down to Orange County! I've always wondered if there's some sort of cover-your-ass corporate terminology for "we screwed up and in the process screwed over our own people"?
Quote from: sparker on August 05, 2016, 05:02:07 AM
I received notice in mid-2010 that my former employer had filed Chapter 11 bankruptcy,
So funny and sad when that happens. If the new owner didn't want any of the know-how from the company they took over, why in the heck did they buy it?
Because he was an idiot whose business base (running a courier service specializing in real-estate escrow and closing documents) was going south with the 2007-2011 housing crisis, and who thought he could make a quick buck getting into the logistics business -- but didn't realize that such a business required competent managers and a certain level of infrastructure, both of which required an outlay of $$. He thought he could retrain his couriers and dispatchers to replace the office and branch management of the original company -- and tried to do precisely that -- but in the process pissed off most of the clients (Cisco, Fujitsu, Isilon, and several other B-to-B server maintainers) when schedules collapsed and merchandise simply disappeared in the shuffle! But he was a self-described "self-made man" who thought he could plow through unknown territory on the cheap! Unfortunately for all his remaining employees, his rude awakening came with the consequences of corporate collapse.
Quote from: sparker on August 05, 2016, 05:02:07 AMlogistics company
Isn't that, right there, pretty much a made-up industry, in the same vein as management-speak? No wonder you had the experience you did!
iPhone
Not necessarily -- the company's business was to run a series of regional warehouses stocking service parts for various firms (some mentioned in my previous thread post) and to maintain a pool of "route drivers" to deliver those parts locally, plus using standardized delivery services (mostly FedEx, but occasionally DHL and UPS as well) to transfer parts as needed to other warehouses elsewhere. In addition, technicians from the client firms would drop by, work order in hand, to pick up items they needed for a particular work order. Inventory was controlled by a 3rd party company based in Minnesota; everything (the Ontario warehouse I managed stocked over 40K items, ranging from small flash drives to palletized mainframes as large as storage sheds!) was contained within a "master list" that was updated on our computers daily. Our company had the franchise in Southern California, maintaining warehouses in San Diego, Ontario, and Torrance, plus a small stocking warehouse at corporate HQ in Irvine. Logistics was not simply another vague form of "managementspeak"; it was an overall term for the "just-in-time" supply aspect of the business. The third-party inventory-control company made me a job offer after I left the "new" firm, but it would have required a move to their southern regional center in Lynchburg, MS (just south of Memphis, TN). As much as I wanted to be near I-22 when the shields went up (yeah, right!), leaving the West Coast, my GF, and my friends & family just wasn't in the cards. Besides, that particular company had their own peculiar form of communication and "managementspeak", plus a tendency to believe that their computerized inventory program was infallible (it wasn't!), so it wouldn't have been much of a fit.
Sounds like he may have also been trying to knock out a competitor.
He did entertain ideas of taking over the next franchise territory, which included the San Fernando Valley, Santa Clarita, and Ventura/Santa Barbara counties; but his ineptitude at managing what he had precluded such plans. He probably knew how to manage a same-day local courier service with reasonable skill -- and likely did very well during the housing boom of the early 2000's -- but when his customer base dropped off the map, he was scrambling to find replacement income. But he ended up dismissing those of us who had acquired the skill set to run a logistic/distribution operation -- he laid us off, one branch at a time, without even asking us to train our replacements! Unfortunately, that takes more in the way of brass cojones than brainpower! May the company R.I.P.!
Quote from: sparker on August 06, 2016, 05:56:44 AM
Not necessarily -- the company's business was to run a series of regional warehouses stocking service parts for various firms (some mentioned in my previous thread post) and to maintain a pool of "route drivers" to deliver those parts locally, plus using standardized delivery services (mostly FedEx, but occasionally DHL and UPS as well) to transfer parts as needed to other warehouses elsewhere.
Yeah, but wouldn't that just be called a "delivery company"? Or a warehouse/supply firm? I'd never heard of a "logistics company" until quite recently, just as I'd never heard of a company selling "solutions"–it always used to just be a "product" or "service".
iPhone
You know companies -- a term begins being utilized in a particular field, and it catches on and finds usage by many companies in the field. Well before I started working for them in 2003, their original name included the term "messenger service" (and, no, David Freiberg wasn't their lead singer!); the "logistics" terminology had been in use since about 1998 or so -- and according to the co-owner of the original company, the term "logistics" had been suggested by the MN-based inventory control company, who apparently wanted their operating partners to use a common terminology. I was hired to do a job, not argue semantics (not that I would have done so in any case). They called themselves a logistics company, and they paid me reasonably well. Period.
Quote from: sparker on August 06, 2016, 07:20:27 PMI was hired to do a job, not argue semantics (not that I would have done so in any case). They called themselves a logistics company, and they paid me reasonably well. Period.
It's okay if your job description didn't include wondering why they were called that–if you're still unsure, I certainly won't see that as a professional failure on your part! :-)
Having looked more into it, it seems the term "logistics" has military origins and was later applied to civilian business, to refer to the planning and movement of goods (usually, though sometimes information or other intangible properties). It looks like it's been in use that way for a while, so perhaps it's only through recent marketing and branding intiatives (how's that for management-speak?) that the word was used in a public context. Prior to that, perhaps it was more of an industry-specific term for itself? It certainly wouldn't be the first time that an industry's jargon became "publicized", either intentionally as a way of embellishing the importance of the industry, or just accidentally because of some happenstance of exposure. (Hanging chads, anyone?)
Or, maybe, for whatever reason, the term has been in both public and internal use for many decades, and I was simply never exposed to it; just because I didn't see it happen, doesn't mean it didn't. Does anybody else have any thoughts on this?
This isn't comprehensive, but I'm going to list a few reasons people start and own their own businesses:
Bad reasons:
"I want to be my own boss." - If you can't get along with and respect authority figures, you're going to have a terrible time with customers, clients and employees.
Egos - Does owning your own business stroke your ego? It's really going to suck when times are hard... and they will be if you start a business to feel like a badass.
To control people - Lord, you're not going to be in full control of them all the time. Have fun micromanaging.
Because you really like the product - This one is dangerous because people who are really into the product often have strong belief systems associated with the product that can limit their success. Too much passion can make business owners make the wrong investments at the wrong times.
Good reasons:
Because you had to - When you have no choice, you'll do what it takes to survive. It also makes you willing to learn and forces you to listen to inputs from others.
To make a lot of money - This is actually a good one for the same reasons as "Because you had to". But if you're screwing people in order to make a lot of money, you aren't going to last very long.
Because you found out you are good at it - Being good at it and having a natural talent is a gift that lets you focus on improving the parts of the business that you aren't as good at yet.
I've learned these things in 6-1/2 years in business for myself, several years of working at other small businesses, observing other businesses and through my past education.
Managementspeak roads.
Synergy Dr.
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1520155,-77.7323677,3a,15y,209.02h,91.25t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sgXB2k8etili2Mw0AUX3RaA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
Initiative Dr.
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1474442,-77.7323967,3a,15y,313.4h,90.27t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sgakfxHI4Eb5jRtvYrGa55Q!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
Innovation Way
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1430518,-77.7362767,3a,15y,26.38h,87.16t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sCQYvlZ5ChltFSoC3WxuOnA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
The complex where these are also has a Creative Dr. but apparently the Google car wasn't allowed in the complex.
Quote from: steviep24 on August 09, 2016, 05:56:34 PM
Managementspeak roads.
Synergy Dr.
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1520155,-77.7323677,3a,15y,209.02h,91.25t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sgXB2k8etili2Mw0AUX3RaA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
Initiative Dr.
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1474442,-77.7323967,3a,15y,313.4h,90.27t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sgakfxHI4Eb5jRtvYrGa55Q!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
Innovation Way
https://www.google.com/maps/@43.1430518,-77.7362767,3a,15y,26.38h,87.16t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1sCQYvlZ5ChltFSoC3WxuOnA!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en
The complex where these are also has a Creative Dr. but apparently the Google car wasn't allowed in the complex.
Business and Industrial parks are repleat with these innovative names for enticing roads. :awesomeface:
Means Drive
Keystone Parkway
Progressive Parkway
Insight Drive
Quote from: SSOWorld on August 10, 2016, 04:57:11 AM
Quote from: steviep24 on August 09, 2016, 05:56:34 PM
Managementspeak roads.
Business and Industrial parks are replete (FTFY) with these innovative names for enticing roads. :awesomeface:
Means Drive
Keystone Parkway
Progressive Parkway
Insight Drive
1 (https://www.google.com/maps/@39.428272,-76.9957124,18z), 2 (https://www.google.com/maps/@39.432432,-76.994146,18z)
Enterprise Street
Venture Way
Competitive Goals Drive
Wise Pursuit Way
Adam Smith Drive
New Expansion Drive
Energetic Endeavor Drive
Quote from: empirestate on August 05, 2016, 10:58:05 PM
Quote from: sparker on August 05, 2016, 05:02:07 AMlogistics company
Isn't that, right there, pretty much a made-up industry, in the same vein as management-speak? No wonder you had the experience you did!
iPhone
Actually I work for a subsidiary of a major logistics company, but I really don't hear many of these buzzwords from the supervisors. They the to abide by the KISS possible whenever possible. Sometimes too much.
I don't know what industries DO utilize these words the most.
Can we take this offline and touch base later?
Somebody just came by with a new one and dangit I forgot it. Wish I could remember!!
Can you get a point for someone giving a powerpoint presentation that would have been a whole lot better without the powerpoint?
Quote from: texaskdog on August 10, 2016, 03:38:02 PM
Can you get a point for someone giving a powerpoint presentation that would have been a whole lot better without the powerpoint?
No, that would make it too easy to get points.
Quote from: Buffaboy on August 10, 2016, 02:53:53 PM
Quote from: empirestate on August 05, 2016, 10:58:05 PM
Quote from: sparker on August 05, 2016, 05:02:07 AMlogistics company
Isn't that, right there, pretty much a made-up industry, in the same vein as management-speak? No wonder you had the experience you did!
iPhone
Actually I work for a subsidiary of a major logistics company, but I really don't hear many of these buzzwords from the supervisors. They the to abide by the KISS possible whenever possible. Sometimes too much.
I don't know what industries DO utilize these words the most.
Well, any industry has its share of jargon; mine certainly has a huge amount! Corporate-style jargon is relatively rare, but there are some elements of it that crop up fairly regularly, as they seem to have entered the public vernacular.
But I was really asking whether the term "logistics company" is itself an example of jargon–in other words, is that a term that the logistics industry self-applies to its business, whereas a layperson would call it by some other common term, such as "shipping", "warehousing", "inventory" or even "supply chain management"?
iPhone
Quote from: texaskdog on August 10, 2016, 03:38:02 PM
Can you get a point for someone giving a powerpoint presentation that would have been a whole lot better without the powerpoint?
Or worse, a PowerPoint where they just read the slides word-for-word. You could have just emailed me the slideshow and saved me the time.
Quote from: Scott5114 on August 11, 2016, 01:49:48 AM
Quote from: texaskdog on August 10, 2016, 03:38:02 PM
Can you get a point for someone giving a powerpoint presentation that would have been a whole lot better without the powerpoint?
Or worse, a PowerPoint where they just read the slides word-for-word. You could have just emailed me the slideshow and saved me the time.
Yes. People are even doing that in my Toastmaster clubs.
I would think that Toastmasters would call them out on it–that seems to be the sort of thing Toastmasters is supposed to teach, isn't it?
Quote from: Scott5114 on August 11, 2016, 08:29:01 PM
I would think that Toastmasters would call them out on it—that seems to be the sort of thing Toastmasters is supposed to teach, isn't it?
Oh you better believe it. Any time I'm the evaluator I really ride them about it.
Also the district is obsessed with "lessons learned" after every event which I said was a condescending term not realizing it was management speak.
What are Toastmasters?
Quote from: freebrickproductions on August 14, 2016, 02:56:52 PM
What are Toastmasters?
Club focused on public speaking/leadership/communications.
http://bfy.tw/7DXE
she might have said "have a dialogue" ...twice...when I wanted her to just say she was going to talk to someone.
Now I keep having to hear about "Reaching Out". "will you reach out to them..."
One that grates on my ears that I was reminded of when I heard it this morning: reach out.
"I'll reach out to him today" versus "I'll talk to him today."
Calling people "resources" or "assets."
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on August 23, 2016, 10:11:13 AM
Calling people "resources"
And I thought slavery was gone in the United States for over one hundred years.
Quote from: 1 on August 23, 2016, 10:32:48 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on August 23, 2016, 10:11:13 AM
Calling people "resources"
And I thought slavery was gone in the United States for over one hundred years.
Usually it's phrased in some HR document or presentation "people are our greatest resources and/or assets." It ain't slavery if you are paid but it's still pretty demeaning to someone's intelligence to call them anything other than an "employee."
Redundancies annoy me. Stuff like "each and every" or "any and all." I once saw a document that defined the word "each" as meaning "each and every."
A subset or relative of "managementspeak" that I've observed might be termed "law enforcement-speak". I've noticed whenever you hear a press conference given by a spokesman for a law enforcement agency, specific verbiage is very commonly heard, with wording such as "at that point in time", "ascertained", and "the individual" being frequently used.
Is there specific phraseology that's taught as part of standard police training that would be ingrained in the speech of officials giving information to the general public?
Quote from: empirestate on August 23, 2016, 12:49:06 PM
A subset or relative of "managementspeak" that I've observed might be termed "law enforcement-speak". I've noticed whenever you hear a press conference given by a spokesman for a law enforcement agency, specific verbiage is very commonly heard, with wording such as "at that point in time", "ascertained", and "the individual" being frequently used.
Is there specific phraseology that's taught as part of standard police training that would be ingrained in the speech of officials giving information to the general public?
Allegedly.
Quote from: tckma on August 23, 2016, 01:19:45 PM
Quote from: empirestate on August 23, 2016, 12:49:06 PM
A subset or relative of "managementspeak" that I've observed might be termed "law enforcement-speak". I've noticed whenever you hear a press conference given by a spokesman for a law enforcement agency, specific verbiage is very commonly heard, with wording such as "at that point in time", "ascertained", and "the individual" being frequently used.
Is there specific phraseology that's taught as part of standard police training that would be ingrained in the speech of officials giving information to the general public?
Allegedly.
Yep, it's called Avoiding a Lawsuit. If they say someone did it, and that person is found innocent or not guilty, then he/she can sue for slander and usually win.
What gets me is when they use it when the person was found guilty. At that point, the jury decided there was enough evidence that he did do it. But I guess if they go thru the appeal process and the verdict is overturned, they don't want the guy saying "Well, the news media said I did it". Yeah, at the time, so did the jury!
It also gets me that they still use it in very obvious cases, such as "John Doe allegedly slammed his car into the brick wall and had to be removed with the jaws of life". Well, did someone else do it and manage to stuff someone else's body into the wreck?
One thing that bugs me, and that I hear all the time in my line of work, is "the subject project." :banghead:
One I do like "future endevaors". Any time someone gets canned "we wish them well in their future endeavors" as opposed to people who quit with notice and they say good things about them.
Quote from: jeffandnicole on August 23, 2016, 01:47:12 PM
It also gets me that they still use it in very obvious cases, such as "John Doe allegedly slammed his car into the brick wall and had to be removed with the jaws of life". Well, did someone else do it and manage to stuff someone else's body into the wreck?
"Slammed" is an active verb implying active participation. Maybe the Mr. Doe suffered a seizure and lost control.
Quote from: jeffandnicole on August 23, 2016, 01:47:12 PM
Quote from: tckma on August 23, 2016, 01:19:45 PM
Quote from: empirestate on August 23, 2016, 12:49:06 PM
A subset or relative of "managementspeak" that I've observed might be termed "law enforcement-speak". I've noticed whenever you hear a press conference given by a spokesman for a law enforcement agency, specific verbiage is very commonly heard, with wording such as "at that point in time", "ascertained", and "the individual" being frequently used.
Is there specific phraseology that's taught as part of standard police training that would be ingrained in the speech of officials giving information to the general public?
Allegedly.
Yep, it's called Avoiding a Lawsuit. If they say someone did it, and that person is found innocent or not guilty, then he/she can sue for slander and usually win.
I get the "allegedly" thing (it's a guideline for journalists as well), but what about the rest of it?
Quote from: 1995hoo on August 23, 2016, 11:44:24 AM
Redundancies annoy me. Stuff like "each and every" or "any and all." I once saw a document that defined the word "each" as meaning "each and every."
There is a woman who announces the winners of giveaways over the PA at the casino I work at. If the winner doesn't show up, she'll say "This is the last and final call for James Smith, please come to the promotion booth." I asked her if she had ever somehow had one of those last calls not also be the final call, and she said she prefers saying it that way because she thinks it sounds better. She's pretty well known for word-salading it up on the intercom in general–sometimes devolving into hilarity, such as the time she was giving away a tent that could hold ten people and called it a "ten men tent", resulting in jestful queries of whether the ten men came with the tent.
Her coworker is a lot better at making intelligible comments on the intercom, but it's very easy to get her to start laughing hysterically on the mic.
Science cannot explain the differences between a "full flight", "very full flight", and "extremely full flight". If the plane was over 100% capacity, you can bet the FAA wants to know about it, and the airline is delighted that it can tell its investors as much.
Basically, this is how flight attendants tell people to "hurry up".
I just got out of a meeting where someone was going to "take something ofline"
DOT's (well a handful of them) will add "operations" to any activity.
* Mowing operations
* Flagging operations
* Painting operations
* Paving operations
You get the point operations (now that just sounded like bad operations)
And when did companies stop offering products and services and instead begin selling "solutions"?
Quote from: Scott5114 on August 25, 2016, 04:01:35 AM
Quote from: 1995hoo on August 23, 2016, 11:44:24 AM
Redundancies annoy me. Stuff like "each and every" or "any and all." I once saw a document that defined the word "each" as meaning "each and every."
There is a woman who announces the winners of giveaways over the PA at the casino I work at. If the winner doesn't show up, she'll say "This is the last and final call for James Smith, please come to the promotion booth." ....
Heh, I'd forgotten about that one. Many of the Metrorail operators here say that too when the train is approaching the end of the line. "This is the last and final stop."
Quote from: formulanone on August 25, 2016, 09:37:06 AM
Science cannot explain the differences between a "full flight", "very full flight", and "extremely full flight". If the plane was over 100% capacity, you can bet the FAA wants to know about it, and the airline is delighted that it can tell its investors as much.
Basically, this is how flight attendants tell people to "hurry up".
The concepts of a non-stop flight and a "near miss" are other airline words. I think it was George Carlin who pointed out that he wants his plane to stop at the end of the flight. And a near miss? "Aw, we nearly missed him, but we finally managed to hit that other plane."
we need one for regular people talking "real quick" "to be honest" "I mean" .......
Quote from: SSOWorld on August 27, 2016, 07:17:42 AM
DOT's (well a handful of them) will add "operations" to any activity.
* Mowing operations
* Flagging operations
* Painting operations
* Paving operations
You get the point operations (now that just sounded like bad operations)
Ha. When I first started with KYTC, the maintenance branch was called the Operations Branch. Before I joined, I had no idea what "Operations" was. It didn't make sense.
Each district had five branches -- Operations (maintenance), Construction (the inspectors overseeing contractor jobs), Planning (self-explanatory), Pre-Construction (preparing projects for bid) and a catch-all branch, the name of which I cannot remember, that covered equipment, structures (bridges), roadside/agronomy, fleet maintenance, permits, traffic (signs and signals) and various other things.
If you want managementspeak, get a load of the name of the branches now. Eight years ago KYTC reorganized, merging planning into pre-construction and combining maintenance and construction, then splitting them into two branches each covering half the district. Now each district has two Project Delivery & Preservation (PD&P) branches, a Project Development Branch and an Engineering Support Branch.
I think most people would look at that and say, "What is Project Delivery and Preservation supposed to be?"
Quote from: hbelkins on August 27, 2016, 11:45:29 PM
Quote from: SSOWorld on August 27, 2016, 07:17:42 AM
DOT's (well a handful of them) will add "operations" to any activity.
* Mowing operations
* Flagging operations
* Painting operations
* Paving operations
You get the point operations (now that just sounded like bad operations)
Ha. When I first started with KYTC, the maintenance branch was called the Operations Branch. Before I joined, I had no idea what "Operations" was. It didn't make sense.
Each district had five branches -- Operations (maintenance), Construction (the inspectors overseeing contractor jobs), Planning (self-explanatory), Pre-Construction (preparing projects for bid) and a catch-all branch, the name of which I cannot remember, that covered equipment, structures (bridges), roadside/agronomy, fleet maintenance, permits, traffic (signs and signals) and various other things.
If you want managementspeak, get a load of the name of the branches now. Eight years ago KYTC reorganized, merging planning into pre-construction and combining maintenance and construction, then splitting them into two branches each covering half the district. Now each district has two Project Delivery & Preservation (PD&P) branches, a Project Development Branch and an Engineering Support Branch.
I think most people would look at that and say, "What is Project Delivery and Preservation supposed to be?"
Geeze sounds like they stole the playbook from Incident Command System. Read up on ICS-100 and ICS-200 on fema.gov to get a good idea what I'm talking about, it's almost word for word what you are describing.
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on August 27, 2016, 11:54:09 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on August 27, 2016, 11:45:29 PM
Quote from: SSOWorld on August 27, 2016, 07:17:42 AM
DOT's (well a handful of them) will add "operations" to any activity.
* Mowing operations
* Flagging operations
* Painting operations
* Paving operations
You get the point operations (now that just sounded like bad operations)
Ha. When I first started with KYTC, the maintenance branch was called the Operations Branch. Before I joined, I had no idea what "Operations" was. It didn't make sense.
Each district had five branches -- Operations (maintenance), Construction (the inspectors overseeing contractor jobs), Planning (self-explanatory), Pre-Construction (preparing projects for bid) and a catch-all branch, the name of which I cannot remember, that covered equipment, structures (bridges), roadside/agronomy, fleet maintenance, permits, traffic (signs and signals) and various other things.
If you want managementspeak, get a load of the name of the branches now. Eight years ago KYTC reorganized, merging planning into pre-construction and combining maintenance and construction, then splitting them into two branches each covering half the district. Now each district has two Project Delivery & Preservation (PD&P) branches, a Project Development Branch and an Engineering Support Branch.
I think most people would look at that and say, "What is Project Delivery and Preservation supposed to be?"
Geeze sounds like they stole the playbook from Incident Command System. Read up on ICS-100 and ICS-200 on fema.gov to get a good idea what I'm talking about, it's almost word for word what you are describing.
which leads to Acrononym and Abbreviation overload [PDP, CDDP, FT4, iT4, TLA (guess what that means), ECU, ACU, ACLU (oh wait..)]
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
Quote from: wanderer2575 on August 29, 2016, 09:30:27 PM
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
Or even the "I have a question". Or even better..."Question". Just ask it!!!
"Silly question" is the one I hear a lot, but that's probably a quirk of one of the managers here.
"Can I ask a question?"
"You just did."
---------------
And, "to make a long story short" - usually it's too late.
Not quite "Managementspeak" but "retailspeak" or "lazyspeak" fits:
"Are you finding everything okay?"
- No, there's a busted shelf in aisle 6
Kwik-Trip and Kwik-Star (Iowa name for the same)
"Any gas out there?" (weak method of complying with the policy of verifying that the customer paid for gas purchased if any)
- Well, they're your tanks, why didn't you check them yourself? :awesomeface:
Along these lines, I have come to loathe and despise 'scripting.'
"It's a great day here at _____; how may I help you?
"We deliver high-quality service here at ____"
"We'd like to earn your five-star rating here at _____"
I hate wading thru the telephone tree to find a live human being, only to find that he/she still can't give me an answer or actually help because 'this call is being monitored' ....
Quote from: wanderer2575 on August 29, 2016, 09:30:27 PM
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
I also hear that phrase when someone butts into a conversation...
"I just have a quick question."In my line of work, I hear the phrase
"Can I get a quick oil change?" quite a lot. Just for once, I'd like to hear:
"Can I get a slow oil change?" "You know...where they wait around an hour before putting the vehicle on the rack? Hang out in the parts department and talk about everything else but my vehicle? Leisurely drain all the oil and watch a couple of YouTube videos long after that's happened? Check out several things on the vehicle, while you're at it? And then I'll postpone calling you back a few hours with your recommendations, and then I tell you 'I just need my car back now!' And make too much chit-chat with the cashier when I go pay for it?"
In the vein of both retail-speak and scripting, NYC drugstores (apparently headed by Duane Reade) have lately replaced "Next?" with "Following guest?" Some social media wags have quipped that it's inappropriate to say "Following guest:" without then naming the following guest, whom you intend to call forward. :-)
iPhone
Quote from: empirestate on August 23, 2016, 12:49:06 PM
A subset or relative of "managementspeak" that I've observed might be termed "law enforcement-speak". I've noticed whenever you hear a press conference given by a spokesman for a law enforcement agency, specific verbiage is very commonly heard, with wording such as "at that point in time", "ascertained", and "the individual" being frequently used.
Is there specific phraseology that's taught as part of standard police training that would be ingrained in the speech of officials giving information to the general public?
Short answer=yes.
The phraseology is really meant for the reports that get written on an crime/incident. It ends up infiltrating the way we speak over time. By the time one is far enough up the food chain to be viewed on TV giving information to the public about an incident, they have been writing/speaking that language for at least a decade, probably more, so it's the only way they know how to communicate.
They also have to be very careful about their choice of words. It's a big leap, legally, to graduate a person from an "individual" to "a person of interest" or even worse yet- "a suspect", for example. To call Joe Blow a suspect too early in the process could seriously hinder an investigation.
Quote from: empirestate on August 31, 2016, 09:31:44 PM
In the vein of both retail-speak and scripting, NYC drugstores (apparently headed by Duane Reade) have lately replaced "Next?" with "Following guest?" Some social media wags have quipped that it's inappropriate to say "Following guest:" without then naming the following guest, whom you intend to call forward. :-)
iPhone
In the medical world, everyone calls them 'barkeep'
* The doctor will be in momentarily
* a pharmacy technician handles the transaction, drops the prescription and says "and the pharmacist will hand this to you". (This is script at Walgreens)
I know culture - but the
do have names
Quote from: SSOWorld on August 27, 2016, 07:17:42 AM
DOT's (well a handful of them) will add "operations" to any activity.
* Mowing operations
* Flagging operations
* Painting operations
* Paving operations
You get the point operations (now that just sounded like bad operations)
To quote the late George Carlin, " 'Police responded to an emergency situation.' No they didn't. They responded to an emergency. We KNOW it's a situation. EVERYTHING is a situation."
Quote from: jeffandnicole on August 29, 2016, 09:54:23 PM
Quote from: wanderer2575 on August 29, 2016, 09:30:27 PM
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
Or even the "I have a question". Or even better..."Question". Just ask it!!!
My typical response to "Can I ask you a question?" is "You just did."
(Less often, "Do you know where the bathroom is?" and "Do you know what time it is?" get a response of "Yes" or "Yes, I do" from me.
Quote from: US 81 on August 31, 2016, 08:39:29 AM
Along these lines, I have come to loathe and despise 'scripting.'
"It's a great day here at _____; how may I help you?
"We deliver high-quality service here at ____"
"We'd like to earn your five-star rating here at _____"
I hate wading thru the telephone tree to find a live human being, only to find that he/she still can't give me an answer or actually help because 'this call is being monitored' ....
If I don't recognize the caller ID, I answer my work phone with: "[company name], this is Tom..." (Actually, most of the time my work phone rings, and I don't recognize the caller ID, I don't answer, because it's likely someone trying to sell me investments.
I hate hate HATE phone scripting. I interned at the auto loans/leases department of Chase Bank one summer when I was in college, as an *INTERNAL* IT/tech support person. They (n.b.: NOT my boss, thankfully) tried to tell me I had to answer the phone with "Welcome to Chase, where the right relationship is everything, how can I help you?" Um, no. EVERYONE who calls me at this number IS ALSO AN EMPLOYEE IN THIS BUILDING. So why the script if I don't even interact with bank customers? We in the tech support department only answered the phone like that to mock the script, e.g. "relationships mean nothing to me," or "Welcome to Sal's Pizza, where today's special has everything, will this be pickup or delivery?"
Quote from: wanderer2575 on August 29, 2016, 09:30:27 PM
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
Again, falls in there with "real quick". If something is so quick, don't add two extra words. Or "to make a long story short..."
Quote from: empirestate on August 31, 2016, 09:31:44 PM
In the vein of both retail-speak and scripting, NYC drugstores (apparently headed by Duane Reade) have lately replaced "Next?" with "Following guest?" Some social media wags have quipped that it's inappropriate to say "Following guest:" without then naming the following guest, whom you intend to call forward. :-)
iPhone
I HATE being called a guest. There is nothing wrong with being a customer. If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:07:03 PM
Quote from: wanderer2575 on August 29, 2016, 09:30:27 PM
I suppose it's not really Managementspeak, but I'm about ready to strangle the next person who wants to ask a "quick question." It's never quick, and just ask the damn question!
Again, falls in there with "real quick". If something is so quick, don't add two extra words. Or "to make a long story short..."
Too late :awesomeface:
Thank you for banking
with us!!!. What? Is this inclusion-speak???
Ending sentences with "today."
"Your total is 10.25 today."
What was is yesterday?
Quote from: tckma on September 02, 2016, 08:47:43 AM
Quote from: US 81 on August 31, 2016, 08:39:29 AM
Along these lines, I have come to loathe and despise 'scripting.'
"It's a great day here at _____; how may I help you?
"We deliver high-quality service here at ____"
"We'd like to earn your five-star rating here at _____"
I hate wading thru the telephone tree to find a live human being, only to find that he/she still can't give me an answer or actually help because 'this call is being monitored' ....
If I don't recognize the caller ID, I answer my work phone with: "[company name], this is Tom..." (Actually, most of the time my work phone rings, and I don't recognize the caller ID, I don't answer, because it's likely someone trying to sell me investments.
I hate hate HATE phone scripting. I interned at the auto loans/leases department of Chase Bank one summer when I was in college, as an *INTERNAL* IT/tech support person. They (n.b.: NOT my boss, thankfully) tried to tell me I had to answer the phone with "Welcome to Chase, where the right relationship is everything, how can I help you?" Um, no. EVERYONE who calls me at this number IS ALSO AN EMPLOYEE IN THIS BUILDING. So why the script if I don't even interact with bank customers? We in the tech support department only answered the phone like that to mock the script, e.g. "relationships mean nothing to me," or "Welcome to Sal's Pizza, where today's special has everything, will this be pickup or delivery?"
The worst ones are the ones that go on for several sentences and cause you to almost forget what you were calling for. I was waiting on a tire replacement at Hibdon Tire and heard the people behind the counter answer the phone several times with "It's a great day at Hibdon Tires Plus, home of the guaranteed lowest prices in the state, this is Rudolph, how may I help you?" That'd probably throw me off track if I was calling for just a short, simple question.
At my work we can see whether or not a call is an external customer (usually shows a full nine-digit phone number or "Transfer from Reception") or a coworker (shows five-digit extension number and location of the phone within the facility, such as "Main Cage"). Although we are supposed to answer with the location we're at and our name, with coworkers, we're likely to get more inventive or try to trip people up by pretending to be each other. I managed to trick a somewhat new coworker into thinking I was Barbara from the cash office (and had to call her back to explain that no, I wasn't Barbara, and she had actually called the right number).
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
I absolutely hate Target anyway. that touchy feely guest BS is only one of many things. I will not work somewhere where I have to call a customer a guest.
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
you got me there.
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
I thought the main reasoning for this had to do with Wal-Mart calling their employees "associates". (I only know about Target due to having worked at one for a couple months.)
Quote from: texaskdog on September 04, 2016, 04:41:12 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
I absolutely hate Target anyway. that touchy feely guest BS is only one of many things. I will not work somewhere where I have to call a customer a guest.
Quote from: 74/171FAN on September 04, 2016, 06:45:20 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
I thought the main reasoning for this had to do with Wal-Mart calling their employees "associates". (I only know about Target due to having worked at one for a couple months.)
I worked there briefly while in college right after getting out of the military. Basically I said something to that affect during orientation and got very quickly corrected with some BS speech on the difference between a "guest" and a "customer." Even back then I was rolling my eyes and that was almost twenty years ago. Needless to say that I didn't last there very long since I was apply for police jobs . They also had employee "levels" to determine ranks. Rank and file people were level 1, leads were level 2, department supervisors were level 3, and team leaders (cough...managers) were level 4 if I remember right.
The really weird one that will throw you off is that they don't play music in their stores. Almost nobody notices it until I point it out to them, there was some weird theory that tied back to that "guest" thing if I remember right. There was also something called "Target Brand" which meant everything did....even paper worked could not be altered since it was "Brand." They had some weird HR videos too, it almost reminded me of cultism. ALSO they had cashiering speed charts that you had to meet "standard" on...like people out of high school give a shit about that kind of thing. :rolleyes:
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 04, 2016, 07:14:27 AM
The really weird one that will throw you off is that they don't play music in their stores. Almost nobody notices it until I point it out to them, there was some weird theory that tied back to that "guest" thing if I remember right.
Well I had recently been hearing music in there. (via them showing the music video for "Me Too" by Meghan Trainor on the TVs in the electronics section, easily one of the worst hit songs of this year)
Quote from: 74/171FAN on September 04, 2016, 08:46:55 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 04, 2016, 07:14:27 AM
The really weird one that will throw you off is that they don't play music in their stores. Almost nobody notices it until I point it out to them, there was some weird theory that tied back to that "guest" thing if I remember right.
Well I had recently been hearing music in there. (via them showing the music video for "Me Too" by Meghan Trainor on the TVs in the electronics section, easily one of the worst hit songs of this year)
Honestly this was the best thing ever to come from a Target store:
(https://www.aaroads.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F1.bp.blogspot.com%2F-mSIi6puKOn0%2FT1BUF1qTIsI%2FAAAAAAAACH8%2FApbEfIr3CvQ%2Fs1600%2Fjennifer-connelly-career-opp.jpg&hash=3b03c70f59a1cd8176dd39d45d617f41752c795f)
And that was in 1991 when they were nothing but a little shit in the retail industry...Sears and Kmart were still viable back then. :-D
There was a handicapped kid that used to play music on the jukebox in the Electronics department. For whatever reason he would do the chicken dance to everything. Nobody wanted to ask him to leave until he started creeping on one of the girls at Customer Service and freaked her out. I want to say he was like 16 or something...damn shame the parents were shitty enough to not keep an eye on him...he REALLY needed the help.
The talk about "guests" and "team members" and the like makes me think of the pretentious terminology used in some coffee shops (notably Starbucks) where they don't like it if you say "small," "medium," or "large." I don't frequent any coffee shops and I've never bothered to learn their little lingo, so when I ask for a large coffee and they reply with something like, "You mean [whatever their term is]?," I usually respond, "Whatever the largest size is."
Quote from: 1995hoo on September 04, 2016, 11:45:49 AM
The talk about "guests" and "team members" and the like makes me think of the pretentious terminology used in some coffee shops (notably Starbucks) where they don't like it if you say "small," "medium," or "large." I don't frequent any coffee shops and I've never bothered to learn their little lingo, so when I ask for a large coffee and they reply with something like, "You mean [whatever their term is]?," I usually respond, "Whatever the largest size is."
If you do that without being careful, they'll bring out a bathtub full.
This whole thing just reminds me of how upset I get when PC terminology for jobs is used. "Sanitation engineer" for "garbage collector," "associate" for "employee" and so on. And I hate the terms "Human Resources" or "HR." How about "personnel?"
Quote from: hbelkins on September 04, 2016, 04:04:46 PM
This whole thing just reminds me of how upset I get when PC terminology for jobs is used. "Sanitation engineer" for "garbage collector," "associate" for "employee" and so on. And I hate the terms "Human Resources" or "HR." How about "personnel?"
I always though "Human Resources" sounded like some kind of harvest waiting to be culled like cattle. Perhaps nobody read who thought of changing it from "Personnel" read The Time Machine or what a Morlock is. I think a lot of these common business terms changed due to them having a negative blue collar legacy to them.
Personally I'd rather go with something like "Garbage Overlord" or "Rat King" since they seem equally as silly as "Sanitation Engineer."
Last weekend I was talking to our next-door neighbor and I was somewhat taken aback when she referred to the mailman as a "postperson."
As much as Walmart probably sucks to work at they don't do the Target guest BS for sure. Target is crying over losing sales over bathrooms, but it was like .02 pct down which is fluctuation.
Quote from: texaskdog on September 04, 2016, 05:54:32 PM
As much as Walmart probably sucks to work at they don't do the Target guest BS for sure. Target is crying over losing sales over bathrooms, but it was like .02 pct down which is fluctuation.
Wal-mart adds words like DOTs do. --- "Member of Management".
Quote from: SSOWorld on September 04, 2016, 06:01:03 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 04, 2016, 05:54:32 PM
As much as Walmart probably sucks to work at they don't do the Target guest BS for sure. Target is crying over losing sales over bathrooms, but it was like .02 pct down which is fluctuation.
Wal-mart adds words like DOTs do. --- "Member of Management", "An associate in or around <department>", etc.
Quote from: 1995hoo on September 04, 2016, 05:08:03 PM
Last weekend I was talking to our next-door neighbor and I was somewhat taken aback when she referred to the mailman as a "postperson."
The correct term is
postal carrier.
Sometimes, a terminology change isn't made just to assuage hurt P.C. feelings but to make language more precise. "Mailman" isn't very descriptive. Assumably it's a man that has something to do with mail. Is that the Postal Clerk behind the counter at your local post office? A Mail Processing Clerk in a USPS Sectional Center Facility?
Look at it this way: Calling the person who stuffs the letters in your mailbox "mailman" is about as accurate referring to patent attorney as a "lawman" .
Quote from: kkt on September 04, 2016, 02:31:54 PM
Quote from: 1995hoo on September 04, 2016, 11:45:49 AM
The talk about "guests" and "team members" and the like makes me think of the pretentious terminology used in some coffee shops (notably Starbucks) where they don't like it if you say "small," "medium," or "large." I don't frequent any coffee shops and I've never bothered to learn their little lingo, so when I ask for a large coffee and they reply with something like, "You mean [whatever their term is]?," I usually respond, "Whatever the largest size is."
If you do that without being careful, they'll bring out a bathtub full.
And the smallest size isn't on the menu...you specifically have to ask for it.
Quote from: jeffandnicole on September 04, 2016, 06:49:50 PM
Quote from: kkt on September 04, 2016, 02:31:54 PM
Quote from: 1995hoo on September 04, 2016, 11:45:49 AM
The talk about "guests" and "team members" and the like makes me think of the pretentious terminology used in some coffee shops (notably Starbucks) where they don't like it if you say "small," "medium," or "large." I don't frequent any coffee shops and I've never bothered to learn their little lingo, so when I ask for a large coffee and they reply with something like, "You mean [whatever their term is]?," I usually respond, "Whatever the largest size is."
If you do that without being careful, they'll bring out a bathtub full.
And the smallest size isn't on the menu...you specifically have to ask for it.
that's the kid size or the "value" drink. which you can buy for a buck and just keep filling the cup. what used to be large is now small.
American size!!!! :awesomeface:
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
Well, as a project for my side job (mystery shopping and property evaluations) I once did a mannequin assessment at Target. The job required you to walk to the service desk, ask for the "manager on duty," and then go on to do the rest of the assessment with that person. When I asked to speak to the "manager on duty," they seemed to know who I was asking for.
Quote from: 1995hoo on September 04, 2016, 11:45:49 AM
The talk about "guests" and "team members" and the like makes me think of the pretentious terminology used in some coffee shops (notably Starbucks) where they don't like it if you say "small," "medium," or "large." I don't frequent any coffee shops and I've never bothered to learn their little lingo, so when I ask for a large coffee and they reply with something like, "You mean [whatever their term is]?," I usually respond, "Whatever the largest size is."
Good gravy, that drives me up a wall. I'm usually reminded of this Foamy the Squirrel sketch (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi9BRgjvOlk).
Quote from: tckma on September 07, 2016, 12:28:39 PM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
Well, as a project for my side job (mystery shopping and property evaluations) I once did a mannequin assessment at Target. The job required you to walk to the service desk, ask for the "manager on duty," and then go on to do the rest of the assessment with that person. When I asked to speak to the "manager on duty," they seemed to know who I was asking for.
They call for the "LOD" or "Leader on Duty?" :rolleyes:
My boss just gave us a deadline of September 31st...
Quote from: Scott5114 on September 14, 2016, 04:58:25 AM
My boss just gave us a deadline of September 31st...
What a relief! I think I can meet that deadline.
Quote from: US 81 on September 14, 2016, 02:25:05 PM
Quote from: Scott5114 on September 14, 2016, 04:58:25 AM
My boss just gave us a deadline of September 31st...
What a relief! I think I can meet that deadline.
"Oh tomorrow never, never comes ..."
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
Quote from: 74/171FAN on September 04, 2016, 06:45:20 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 03, 2016, 10:47:19 PM
Quote from: hbelkins on September 03, 2016, 06:57:01 PM
Quote from: texaskdog on September 02, 2016, 06:08:20 PM
If you're staying overnight in a hotel you're a guest.
No. You're still a customer. You're not a guest at a hotel or restaurant unless you don't have to pay for your room or your meal.
Don't go into a Target store and tell them you are not a guest....they don't have employees either...they have "team members." :rolleyes: They don't have managers either...they have "Team Leaders." :-D
I thought the main reasoning for this had to do with Wal-Mart calling their employees "associates". (I only know about Target due to having worked at one for a couple months.)
Disney world does not have employees but rather cast members
Don't they fire you at Disney if you break the illusion or post something in costume on social media? I've heard so many SS Death's Head stories about Disney over the years that makes you wonder how bad it really gets even if a quarter of them were true.
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 15, 2016, 12:10:19 AM
Don't they fire you at Disney if you break the illusion or post something in costume on social media? I've heard so many SS Death's Head stories about Disney over the years that makes you wonder how bad it really gets even if a quarter of them were true.
I would not be surprised with anything that goes on there considering what Miley Cyrus (former Hannah Montana) has become now.
Quote from: jwolfer on September 14, 2016, 09:04:19 PM
Disney world does not have employees but rather cast members
See, but that makes sense.
Although, the last time I was at Disney, I stayed at an on-property hotel, and I caught one of the housekeeping doors open with a sign that says: "Warning: Door opens onto stage!" I think that's taking it a bit TOO far.
Quote from: 74/171FAN on September 15, 2016, 12:27:33 AM
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 15, 2016, 12:10:19 AM
Don't they fire you at Disney if you break the illusion or post something in costume on social media? I've heard so many SS Death's Head stories about Disney over the years that makes you wonder how bad it really gets even if a quarter of them were true.
I would not be surprised with anything that goes on there considering what Miley Cyrus (former Hannah Montana) has become now.
Caution, twerking near Space Mountain! :awesomeface: