What do the numbers on LA's I-405 mean?
"Go 4 or 5"
I'm not really the best at coming up with good jokes, but I'll give it a shot, using what pops into my head at this very moment.
1 => What do you call a 3di pretending to be a 2di? => I-97
2 => What is the only three-digit Interstate that lives in an orphanage? => I-238
3 => If a truss bridge was a person, and he had no tea, then what is his name? => Russ B. Ridge
4 => What would you call the I-70/I-76 "interchange" if it was in a tree with a beehive? => Beeswood
5 => What would you call a traffic signal if it was a bird? => Flashing Yellow Sparrow
I know, these are terrible jokes, but it's the best I had for now. :-D :pan:
What's IDOT stand for?
A bunch of people who can't even spell "idiot" properly.
The plural of 3dus is 3di.
HWY is what a kid says on a swingset.
ODOT.
Cop: "Sir, do you know why I pulled you over?"
Motorist (sheepish): "My bad. I think because I was on I-65 that the speed limit was 65. Dumb mistake."
Cop: "Actually, the speed limit here is 65, but-"
Motorist: "Good thing I wasn't on I-70!"
Cop: "But the speed limit there is-- anyway, you've got a busted taillight."
also:
Off-color joke involving Caltrans BGS designers and the punchline is "They just try to jam it in anywhere it might fit."
Quote from: ColossalBlocks on January 06, 2018, 12:33:17 PM
ODOT.
I specifically talk about the Oregon but I don't know about the others.
100% agree.
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 07, 2018, 04:55:50 PM
Quote from: ColossalBlocks on January 06, 2018, 12:33:17 PM
ODOT.
I don't get it.
He's probably referring to Oklahoma, not Ohio or Oregon. ODOT is a joke beCaµse they c
An't sεεm to dO a
NythınG co
Rяectl
Y.
Quote from: 1 on January 07, 2018, 04:59:05 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 07, 2018, 04:55:50 PM
Quote from: ColossalBlocks on January 06, 2018, 12:33:17 PM
ODOT.
I don't get it.
He's probably referring to Oklahoma, not Ohio or Oregon. ODOT is a joke beCaµse they cAn't sεεm to dO aNythınG coRяectlY.
ODOT did craIG c0UNT
Y
Quote from: SSOWorld on January 07, 2018, 08:28:31 PM
Quote from: 1 on January 07, 2018, 04:59:05 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 07, 2018, 04:55:50 PM
Quote from: ColossalBlocks on January 06, 2018, 12:33:17 PM
ODOT.
I don't get it.
He's probably referring to Oklahoma, not Ohio or Oregon. ODOT is a joke beCaµse they cAn't sεεm to dO aNythınG coRяectlY.
ODOT did craIG c0UNTY
I don't think anything beats that, but Oklahoma also did the S.E 44 Th. sign and the cOnC3Ssi0Ns sign on the Cimarron turnpike.
Quote from: Brandon on January 06, 2018, 07:49:49 AM
What's IDOT stand for?
A bunch of people who can't even spell "idiot" properly.
What does IDOT stand for?
Not much, really.
Once there were two morons going on a road trip to Florida. They saw a sign that said "Disney World LEFT," so they went home.
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Quote from: 1 on January 06, 2018, 08:45:47 AM
The plural of 3dus is 3di.
I love it!
Quote from: inkyatari on January 08, 2018, 09:12:16 AM
Once there were two morons going on a road trip to Florida. They saw a sign that said "Disney World LEFT," so they went home.
It's OK to admit they were blondes.
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
This belongs in Fictional.
Quote from: kphoger on January 08, 2018, 02:40:48 PM
Quote from: inkyatari on January 08, 2018, 09:12:16 AM
Once there were two morons going on a road trip to Florida. They saw a sign that said "Disney World LEFT," so they went home.
It's OK to admit they were blondes.
Actually, I got that from a North Dakota joke book from when I was a kid.
Quote from: inkyatari on January 08, 2018, 02:43:34 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 08, 2018, 02:40:48 PM
Quote from: inkyatari on January 08, 2018, 09:12:16 AM
Once there were two morons going on a road trip to Florida. They saw a sign that said "Disney World LEFT," so they went home.
It's OK to admit they were blondes.
Actually, I got that from a North Dakota joke book from when I was a kid.
When they told the joke on The Sopranos, it was about two hunters who saw a sign that said "Bear Left."
The weather reports often say stuff that heavier precipitation is expected "east of I-95" or "west of I-81".
How do the weather patterns decide which interstates to follow?
Quote from: lepidopteran on January 08, 2018, 08:04:10 PM
The weather reports often say stuff that heavier precipitation is expected "east of I-95" or "west of I-81".
How do the weather patterns decide which interstates to follow?
Or, how do the interstates decide which weather to follow? :-D
These type of statements are made all the time by weather forecasters in Rochester. "North of Route 104" and "North of the Thruway" are the most common. They're usually pretty accurate too, though, with increases in lake effect snow often occuring around or just north of those corridors.
Quote from: kphoger on January 08, 2018, 02:40:48 PM
Quote from: 1 on January 06, 2018, 08:45:47 AM
The plural of 3dus is 3di.
I love it!
I'm not convinced that's a joke. I've pondered it, but - maybe I'm missing the point?
Quote from: webny99 on January 08, 2018, 09:21:57 PM
Quote from: 1 on January 06, 2018, 08:45:47 AM
The plural of 3dus is 3di.
I love it!
I'm not convinced that's a joke. I've pondered it, but - maybe I'm missing the point?
[/quote]
us → i is a common irregular plural form.
3dus means "3-digit US route".
3di means "3-digit Interstate".
Quote from: webny99 on January 08, 2018, 09:21:57 PM
Quote from: lepidopteran on January 08, 2018, 08:04:10 PM
The weather reports often say stuff that heavier precipitation is expected "east of I-95" or "west of I-81".
How do the weather patterns decide which interstates to follow?
Or, how do the interstates decide which weather to follow? :-D
These type of statements are made all the time by weather forecasters in Rochester. "North of Route 104" and "North of the Thruway" are the most common. They're usually pretty accurate too, though, with increases in lake effect snow often occuring around or just north of those corridors.
East/West of I-65 is often used here on weather reports as I-65 goes straight-up through the middle of the Tennessee Valley.
Quote from: 1
us → i is a common irregular plural form.
Aha! That's the connection I failed to make. Not enough to make me laugh out loud, but pretty clever.
Quote
3dus means "3-digit US route".
3di means "3-digit Interstate".
Now I feel insulted :-D
Be careful how you say the word route, because one way is the bottom part of a tree ("root"), and the other is a blowout in sports ("rout"). Kind of like the "po-tay-to"/"po-tah-to" conundrum.
Example:
"Can you tell me the way to Route (Root) 17?"
"You mean the tree with the number 17 on it?"
"No, the road, Route (Root) 17."
"First of all, that's a tree you're thinking of, and secondly, Route (Rout) 17 is about one mile to the left."
"There was a blowout in last night's game? I must've missed it, but thanks anyway."
"You're welcome, but I don't know what game you're thinking of; have a nice day."
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
Quote from: sparker on January 12, 2018, 03:16:55 AM
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
:rofl: :rofl: :clap: :clap: :-D :-D
Quote from: sparker on January 12, 2018, 03:16:55 AM
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
Reword! :-D :sombrero:
Quote from: kurumi on January 06, 2018, 03:32:15 PM
Cop: "Sir, do you know why I pulled you over?"
Motorist (sheepish): "My bad. I think because I was on I-65 that the speed limit was 65. Dumb mistake."
Cop: "Actually, the speed limit here is 65, but-"
Motorist: "Good thing I wasn't on I-70!"
Cop: "But the speed limit there is-- anyway, you've got a busted taillight."
A variation of this joke is:
State trooper observes car with elderly driver and passengers going very slowly, and pulls car over.
Trooper: Can you explain why you were going so slowly?
Driver: I was going exactly 17, which is the speed limit here.
Trooper: Well, 17 is actually the route number, and not the speed limit.
Driver: I wasn't aware of that. Sorry officer.
Trooper: By the way, are your passengers OK? They haven't moved or said a word since I stopped you.
Driver: Oh, they'll be fine in a few minutes. We just got off of Route 135.
Quote from: TheArkansasRoadgeek on January 12, 2018, 11:01:20 AM
Quote from: sparker on January 12, 2018, 03:16:55 AM
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
Reword! :-D :sombrero:
You spelled "reward" wrong.
~or~
Proper response:
What! And mess up the upholstery! No way!
Quote from: sparker on January 12, 2018, 03:16:55 AM
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
Finally, someone comes up with a punch line.
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but it only takes one to masturbate in a light bulb.
I always heard that joke in relation to flies. With a big enough bulb I guess anything is possible.
A couple is driving down I-70 in Utah
Wife "Dave, do you think that you should get gas?
Husband "No, I will wait until the next exit with gas"
This does not end well.
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 16, 2018, 05:09:28 PM
A couple is driving down I-70 in Utah
Wife "Dave, do you think that you should get gas?
Husband "No, I will wait until the next exit with gas"
This does not end well.
Really? I imagine it ends up with Dave flagging down a driver to take him into Salina or Green River, buying a jerry can full of gas, then flagging another driver back to their car again. And that's assuming they've somehow ignored this sign:
(https://www.interstate-guide.com/images070/i-070_wb_after_green_river_280.jpg)
Quote from: kphoger on January 16, 2018, 06:13:33 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 16, 2018, 05:09:28 PM
A couple is driving down I-70 in Utah
Wife "Dave, do you think that you should get gas?
Husband "No, I will wait until the next exit with gas"
This does not end well.
Really? I imagine it ends up with Dave flagging down a driver to take him into Salina or Green River, buying a jerry can full of gas, then flagging another driver back to their car again. And that's assuming they've somehow ignored this sign:
(https://www.interstate-guide.com/images070/i-070_wb_after_green_river_280.jpg)
And this one is posted right
before the last Green River exit:
(https://farm5.staticflickr.com/4733/24592975667_638d0d3421_n.jpg) (https://flic.kr/p/DtcqRR)
Quote from: roadguy2 on January 17, 2018, 12:38:44 AM
Quote from: kphoger on January 16, 2018, 06:13:33 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 16, 2018, 05:09:28 PM
A couple is driving down I-70 in Utah
Wife "Dave, do you think that you should get gas?
Husband "No, I will wait until the next exit with gas"
This does not end well.
Really? I imagine it ends up with Dave flagging down a driver to take him into Salina or Green River, buying a jerry can full of gas, then flagging another driver back to their car again. And that's assuming they've somehow ignored this sign:
(https://www.interstate-guide.com/images070/i-070_wb_after_green_river_280.jpg)
And this one is posted right before the last Green River exit:
(https://farm5.staticflickr.com/4733/24592975667_638d0d3421_n.jpg) (https://flic.kr/p/DtcqRR)
Dave is an anti roadgeek and does not like signs.
Quote from: kphoger on January 12, 2018, 01:23:46 PM
Quote from: TheArkansasRoadgeek on January 12, 2018, 11:01:20 AM
Quote from: sparker on January 12, 2018, 03:16:55 AM
Quote from: Throckmorton on January 08, 2018, 01:49:32 PM
How many roadgeeks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.....none, roadgeeks prefer screwing in vehicles.
Reword! :-D :sombrero:
You spelled "reward" wrong.
~or~
Proper response: What! And mess up the upholstery! No way!
That's what seat covers are for!
For me, as a (sort of) (ish) new user, the jokes I'm interested in are inside forum ones.
I know about Alanland, and I know about I-366 with an 85 mph limit, but are there any others?
Quote from: webny99 on January 17, 2018, 11:32:20 PM
For me, as a (sort of) (ish) new user, the jokes I'm interested in are inside forum ones.
I know about Alanland, and I know about I-366 with an 85 mph limit, but are there any others?
"bip"
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 07:49:18 AM
"bip"
I've heard that, but I don't know where it came from or what the significance is :-D
Pooing is cool.
Quote from: webny99 on January 18, 2018, 08:29:19 AM
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 07:49:18 AM
"bip"
I've heard that, but I don't know where it came from or what the significance is :-D
I think that came from the fight between bugo and Zeffy that led to bugo creating a new forum called biproads. Unless it's even older.
Quote from: vdeane on January 18, 2018, 02:18:22 PM
Quote from: webny99 on January 18, 2018, 08:29:19 AM
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 07:49:18 AM
"bip"
I've heard that, but I don't know where it came from or what the significance is :-D
I think that came from the fight between bugo and Zeffy that led to bugo creating a new forum called biproads. Unless it's even older.
It's much older.
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 02:59:38 PM
Quote from: vdeane on January 18, 2018, 02:18:22 PM
Quote from: webny99 on January 18, 2018, 08:29:19 AM
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 07:49:18 AM
"bip"
I've heard that, but I don't know where it came from or what the significance is :-D
I think that came from the fight between bugo and Zeffy that led to bugo creating a new forum called biproads. Unless it's even older.
It's much older.
Yes, I would like to think that for many, many years, "because it bips" was a common phrase around here. :biggrin:
Quote from: adventurernumber1 on January 18, 2018, 03:04:04 PM
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 02:59:38 PM
Quote from: vdeane on January 18, 2018, 02:18:22 PM
Quote from: webny99 on January 18, 2018, 08:29:19 AM
Quote from: 1 on January 18, 2018, 07:49:18 AM
"bip"
I've heard that, but I don't know where it came from or what the significance is :-D
I think that came from the fight between bugo and Zeffy that led to bugo creating a new forum called biproads. Unless it's even older.
It's much older.
Yes, I would like to think that for many, many years, "because it bips" was a common phrase around here. :biggrin:
Search results for that phrase on this site go back to 2012. If I'm not mistaken, biproads.com was created in 2015.
"Bips" dates back to MTR's heyday.
What was in the biproads forum?
Quote from: roadguy2 on January 18, 2018, 06:10:30 PM
What was in the biproads forum?
bugo created biproads as a split from aaroads, since he thought (and still thinks) that the forum is overmoderated. Biproads didn't last long.
Quote from: kphoger on January 18, 2018, 12:25:51 PM
Pooing is cool.
:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: This is not a joke!
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 19, 2018, 04:55:45 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 18, 2018, 12:25:51 PM
Pooing is cool.
:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: This is not a joke!
It was in response to this post:
Quote from: webny99 on January 17, 2018, 11:32:20 PM
For me, as a (sort of) (ish) new user, the jokes I'm interested in are inside forum ones.
I know about Alanland, and I know about I-366 with an 85 mph limit, but are there any others?
Quote from: kphoger on January 19, 2018, 05:04:42 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 19, 2018, 04:55:45 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 18, 2018, 12:25:51 PM
Pooing is cool.
:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: This is not a joke!
It was in response to this post:
Quote from: webny99 on January 17, 2018, 11:32:20 PM
For me, as a (sort of) (ish) new user, the jokes I'm interested in are inside forum ones.
I know about Alanland, and I know about I-366 with an 85 mph limit, but are there any others?
I gathered that, but I would be interested in some more details as to how that became a thing around here :hmmm:
Quote from: webny99 on January 19, 2018, 05:17:38 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 19, 2018, 05:04:42 PM
Quote from: Roadgeekteen on January 19, 2018, 04:55:45 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 18, 2018, 12:25:51 PM
Pooing is cool.
:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: This is not a joke!
It was in response to this post:
Quote from: webny99 on January 17, 2018, 11:32:20 PM
For me, as a (sort of) (ish) new user, the jokes I'm interested in are inside forum ones.
I know about Alanland, and I know about I-366 with an 85 mph limit, but are there any others?
I gathered that, but I would be interested in some more details as to how that became a thing around here :hmmm:
From what I can gather, it goes back at least to 2001 on m.t.r. I'm not sure what user started it all (I guess I'm not with the in crowd), but maybe someone will enlighten us.
Quote from: kphoger on January 19, 2018, 05:42:01 PM
From what I can gather, it goes back at least to 2001 on m.t.r. I'm not sure what user started it all (I guess I'm not with the in crowd), but maybe someone will enlighten us.
Tim Brown.
Quote from: hbelkins on January 19, 2018, 10:46:51 PM
Quote from: kphoger on January 19, 2018, 05:42:01 PM
From what I can gather, it goes back at least to 2001 on m.t.r. I'm not sure what user started it all (I guess I'm not with the in crowd), but maybe someone will enlighten us.
Tim Brown.
only if poo
Tomorrow's Washington Post crossword is titled "Downsizing" and clue 124 across reads as follows; the answer has ten letters.
QuoteAtlas publisher that, after downsizing, becomes basically the same company but way cool?
Traffic on the 405 is so bad they oughta rename LOS ANGELES to LOS FNGELES