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Author Topic: Should I Give Up Here?  (Read 2425 times)

roadman65

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #50 on: August 02, 2018, 05:26:34 PM »

I would like to know why they cannot say its an illness.  Considering that they feel different and cannot tell others feelings, see cues or feel empathy means something inside the brain is not functioning well.  Asperger's creates Bipolar which itself is considered a mental illness but considering itself is something that is not of a normally functioning chemical process, that too should be considered an illness.

As far as the LGTBT community goes, at one time it was considered irregular just as once going over the speed limit was considered breaking the law.  Now over 85 percent of the people do it and though technically it is, it is not being you do not get cited (except maybe in GA to an out of stater or out of the county tag) these days. 

True you are talking about the medical community and they are the ones that consider the definitions and not Westboro, Jimmy Swaggert, or the Right Wing as that is technically opinion of the individual.   The former does indeed matter when defining an illness.

Considering that many from Autism cannot hold jobs and such for that sake some government program should classify one as unfit to obtain money to pay for bills.
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Sheryl Crowe

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #51 on: August 02, 2018, 09:10:35 PM »

Every person is a little bit nuts, just in wildly varying ways.

I think this is profoundly true. In my experience and observation everyone is weird in some way. The only questions are the degree and the visibility.

I've often spoken with people who were discouraged thinking they themselves were too weird. I tell people if you know someone who you don't think is really weird in some way, then you just don't know them well enough. The closer you know someone, anyone, the more you see the weird things. Sometimes it's small things, sometimes big things. But everyone's got 'em.

To me, it's the weird things that make people interesting. When I look back on my life, the places I've lived, the people I've known, and the friends I've had, I see that the people I enjoyed spending time with the most have been people who others thought were "weird." It's been true all my life and it's still true for me now.

So yeah, we're glad you're here.

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vdeane

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #52 on: August 02, 2018, 10:34:46 PM »

I would like to know why they cannot say its an illness.  Considering that they feel different and cannot tell others feelings, see cues or feel empathy means something inside the brain is not functioning well.  Asperger's creates Bipolar which itself is considered a mental illness but considering itself is something that is not of a normally functioning chemical process, that too should be considered an illness.
I feel that we should clarify that just because one has a hard time with body language, facial expressions, etc. does not mean they don't feel empathy.  People with Autism/Aspergers may not as aware of what other people are feeling, but when they become aware, they feel empathy just like others... sometimes moreso.  In fact, recent theories believe the those with Autism/Aspergers actually feel too much empathy!  That would be why we have issues with eye contact - what for most people is regular emotional communication is very, very intense for us and likely hinders us learning these things.

In my case, the fact that I'm an INFJ and have Aspergers leaves me in a weird place.  Being INFJ helps blunt the worst of the Aspergers, but at the same time the two also cancel out the best of each other - I have neither the logical/thinking skills of someone with Aspergers, nor the emotional skills of an INFJ.  I do have some creativity, but am not good enough to use it for anything useful.

My need for routine, planning things well in advance (I'm talking at least a couple weeks to a month just to do something on a Saturday) and time to recharge also makes a normal social life effectively impossible for me.  I do feel lonely fairly often because of it.

In any case, with the increasing emphasis on "soft skills" in the workplace, those of us with Autism/Aspergers are becoming increasingly unemployable.
« Last Edit: August 02, 2018, 10:40:22 PM by vdeane »
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adventurernumber1

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #53 on: August 03, 2018, 02:33:15 AM »

I would like to know why they cannot say its an illness.  Considering that they feel different and cannot tell others feelings, see cues or feel empathy means something inside the brain is not functioning well.  Asperger's creates Bipolar which itself is considered a mental illness but considering itself is something that is not of a normally functioning chemical process, that too should be considered an illness.
I feel that we should clarify that just because one has a hard time with body language, facial expressions, etc. does not mean they don't feel empathy.  People with Autism/Aspergers may not as aware of what other people are feeling, but when they become aware, they feel empathy just like others... sometimes moreso.  In fact, recent theories believe the those with Autism/Aspergers actually feel too much empathy!  That would be why we have issues with eye contact - what for most people is regular emotional communication is very, very intense for us and likely hinders us learning these things.

In my case, the fact that I'm an INFJ and have Aspergers leaves me in a weird place.  Being INFJ helps blunt the worst of the Aspergers, but at the same time the two also cancel out the best of each other - I have neither the logical/thinking skills of someone with Aspergers, nor the emotional skills of an INFJ.  I do have some creativity, but am not good enough to use it for anything useful.

My need for routine, planning things well in advance (I'm talking at least a couple weeks to a month just to do something on a Saturday) and time to recharge also makes a normal social life effectively impossible for me.  I do feel lonely fairly often because of it.

In any case, with the increasing emphasis on "soft skills" in the workplace, those of us with Autism/Aspergers are becoming increasingly unemployable.

Very well said, vdeane!

Another thing is that us people with autism may feel empathy, but we may not always know how to express it. Someone could tell me terrible news and I could feel incredibly saddened and feel lots of sorrow and empathy, but I could easily be sitting there with a blank face and little expression at first. More often than not, though, I will usually be much more emotional and react more heavily to the situation later on (perhaps a few hours later). Sometimes the emotions I exhibit could also be the complete opposite of what I actually feel or what is appropriate for the situation. Sometimes I laugh at inappropriate times, and sometimes I cry at inappropriate times, but it is completely beyond my control, and it doesn't reflect what I actually feel. Sometimes what we actually feel, and the emotions and expressions, or lack thereof, that we actually exhibit don't quite match up.
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mgk920

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #54 on: August 03, 2018, 11:02:15 AM »

Have we recently seen from the OP of this thread?

Mike
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jon daly

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #55 on: August 03, 2018, 12:15:33 PM »

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #56 on: August 03, 2018, 07:36:04 PM »

Quote
Due to that, the feelings of frustration or disappointment due to issues encountered on the forum felt more intense than usual, with the other incident magnifying the feelings.

I can relate. Sometimes I go to great lengths just to troll certain people, and I get frustrated when they don't bite.  :-D :-D :-D :-D
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Max Rockatansky

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #57 on: August 04, 2018, 01:25:34 PM »

Have we recently seen from the OP of this thread?

Mike

Gave up on the thread?

707

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Re: Should I Give Up Here?
« Reply #58 on: August 06, 2018, 07:00:22 PM »

Sorry for vanishing for a bit. I've been busy dealing with private life for a while. I wanted to thank everyone for the support and one of the users for a helpful PM helping to explain something about a person that bothered me a while back. My apologies for bumping this up to date, but I need to give acknowledgement and gratitude where its due. Thanks again everyone for your supportive and kind words. I'm glad I'm not alone out here. :)
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