Chuck Norris becomes a being of pure energy

[Max Rockatansky]

Chuck Norris shed is a mortal body to become a being a piece of pure energy.  I assume he is fighting a pantheon of malevolent gods in hand to hand combat as I write this. 

https://screenrant.com/chuck-norris-death-obituary/

[Bobby5280]

I imagine the Grim Reaper is getting an ass-beating from the soul he just grabbed.

[ZLoth]

https://www.nbclosangeles.com/entertainment/entertainment-news/chuck-norris-action-icon-martial-arts-champion-dies-at-86/3864246/
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/obituaries/chuck-norris-dies-86-action-hero-walker-texas-ranger-actor-rcna225833
https://www.cnn.com/2026/03/20/entertainment/chuck-norris-death

And here I was thinking Chuck was going to give death a nice roundhouse kick.

[1995hoo]

I imagine the Grim Reaper is getting an ass-beating from the soul he just grabbed.

Death once had a near–Chuck Norris experience.

[Beltway]

You don't believe in "once dead always dead"?

[Bobby5280]

Chuck Norris actually died 20 years ago; but Death couldn't work up the courage to tell him until now.

[MikeTheActuary]

The Grim Reaper didn't come for Chuck Norris; Chuck Norris came for the Grim Reaper.

[kphoger]

After dying, Chuck Norris built his own coffin with his bare hands.

[TheHighwayMan3561]

After taking Chuck, the Reaper had immediate regrets and wanted to send him back to the living world. but Chuck doesn't take orders from Death.

[freebrickproductions]

Last I heard the authorities were suspecting foul play was involved in his death. The current list of suspects includes Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan. Witnesses were reportedly left in 'total awe' of the confrontation, with some of them saying they "came out of nowhere lightning fast" and they "kicked [Chuch Norris] in his cowboy ass".

[kphoger]

I assume he is fighting a pantheon of malevolent gods in hand to hand combat as I write this.

He's taking on the angels, one by one, in a series of Jiu-Jitsu and Judo contests.

[kphoger]

The current list of suspects includes Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan.

That's how many it took to bring him down.

[1995hoo]

Chuck Norris once told a woman to calm down and she did.

[Max Rockatansky]

I just read Chuck's obituary:

"In the first age, in the first battle, when the shadows first lengthened, one stood, burned by the embers of Armageddon, his soul blistered by the fires of hell and tainted beyond ascension.  He chose the path of perpetual torment.  In his ravenous hatred he found no peace, and with boiling blood he scoured the umbral plans seeking vengeance against the dark lords who had wronged him.  He wore the crown of the Chun Kuk Do, and those who tasted the bite of his side kick name him the Texas Ranger."

[kphoger]

Chuck Norris once told a woman to calm down and she did.

Dude.

[The_Ginger]

Last I heard the authorities were suspecting foul play was involved in his death. The current list of suspects includes Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan. Witnesses were reportedly left in 'total awe' of the confrontation, with some of them saying they "came out of nowhere lightning fast" and they "kicked [Chuch Norris] in his cowboy ass".

This is from the Ultimate Showdown, isn't it?

(By they way, the comments on the video now reflect his passing)

[wanderer2575]

So now who's gonna rescue Alex Cahill when she gets kidnapped every third episode of Walker, Texas Ranger?

[Beltway]

Line from a book about the Battle of Midway, where when the Yorktown was dive bombed down the stack, a seaman near the top of the stack was thrown so high in the air that he thought he could see the whole task force.

He thought to himself, "Being dead is not nearly as bad as I thought it would be."

He blacked out momentarily and when he came to he was hanging over the rail four levels below, shaken up but unhurt.

[kphoger]

Chuck Norris died last night, but he's fine now.

[JayhawkCO]

Chuck Norris didn't flush the toilet. He just scared the shit out of it.

[1995hoo]

When Chuck Norris crosses the street, traffic looks both ways.

[freebrickproductions]

Last I heard the authorities were suspecting foul play was involved in his death. The current list of suspects includes Gandalf the Grey and Gandalf the White and Monty Python and the Holy Grail's black knight and Benito Mussolini and the Blue Meanie and Cowboy Curtis and Jambi the Genie, Robocop, The Terminator, Captain Kirk, and Darth Vader, Lo-pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, Spock, The Rock, Doc Ock, and Hulk Hogan. Witnesses were reportedly left in 'total awe' of the confrontation, with some of them saying they "came out of nowhere lightning fast" and they "kicked [Chuch Norris] in his cowboy ass".

This is from the Ultimate Showdown, isn't it?

(By they way, the comments on the video now reflect his passing)

Yep, lol.

[1995hoo]

When Chuck Norris tells a joke about Will Smith's wife, Will Smith stands up and smacks his wife.

[NWI_Irish96]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero

Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi

[Beltway]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero

Hitler learns he Cannot Divide by Zero
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erG1EI-cDpY