I encountered these articles from BuzzFeed and thought they were interesting:
- Things We Hated As Children That We Now Love As Adults (https://markholtz.info/2s7)
- 22 Things People Are Too Old To Deal With (https://markholtz.info/2s8)
- Older Adults Give Life Advice To Younger People (https://markholtz.info/2sa)
(From Link 1) Nah. Weddings still suck as an adult. And you're also now responsible for paying for going to them and being on the hook for additional cards/gifts for the married couple.
The older I get, the more I realize how wrong my parents were about things.
I'll hit this itemized from article one:
- I never have liked naps or sleeping in general.
- I still don't enjoy weddings. I'd say on the whole the lack of interest I had in lengthy social interactions as a child has only gotten more pronounced in adulthood.
- I get way more upset about people wanting to change what they doing last minute then outright cancelling something. Someone bailing on me doesn't generally affect what I was planning to do.
- I mostly listen to 70s-90s music already. I didn't dislike 50s-60s music as a child, and I don't mind it as an adult.
- I'm not close with my siblings, my wife finds this odd.
- I still drink about the same amount of diet soda in adulthood if not more than I was a kid.
- I like when my wife makes dinner for me because I generally don't like to cook. Cooking was always a means to an end activity that I never got much enjoyment out of. I do like trying new things that she makes; I was decidedly pickier as a kid.
- I liked quiet as a kid and I still do now.
- I have never liked not having things to do. I spent a lot of time out exploring the woods and riding my moped around as a child. As an adult I like hiking and finding new roads to drive on.
- I don't like being the passenger and don't give up my driving role very often. It probably doesn't hurt that I actually enjoy driving.
- Socks as a gift while practical is still kind of a letdown.
- I've never not liked documentaries. I have never not enjoyed learning about things "that interested me."
- I only go to bed at 9 PM so I can get a reasonable amount of sleep before morning exercise. I enjoy exercise far more than I do sleep.
- I still enjoy a hot bath now and then.
- Cleaning has never felt rewarding.
- I've always liked long road trips. Some of my best childhood memories were roadgeek oriented stuff with my Dad.
- I don't enjoy going to the doctor. I enjoy it even less now after going through the ringer with two parents that died of cancer.
- I've always liked spicy food even though it has always upset my stomach.
- I played sports when I was kid, but I didn't run. I picked up running when I was 18 and was training for Police physical agility exams. I'm surprised in retrospect I didn't pick up running earlier given I preferred individual sports over team-oriented stuff.
- I've never been all that into salad. I'll eat it, but I can think of way better foods to consume.
- Nonconformity was just not something I found was ever tolerated as a kid. I used to fake being of average intelligence given it tended to make one a social pariah in school, being in athletics did far more for my social standing. I've found that I just don't want to interact with most adults and therefore generally don't care what they think of me.
- School sucked every step of the way. I phoned most of it in during K-12 and my main motivator for doing well in college was that I was paying for it.
From article two:
- I don't interact with people at the grocery store. I'm not lazy enough to stoop to paying for food to be delivered to me.
- I prefer it get light out later in the morning. I rather maximize my available daylight hours for stuff like hiking.
- I don't financial stuff on my phone. Anything I do have on the phone is stuff I don't mind saving the password for.
- I feel as though I was led to believe theme parks were fun as a kid. The reality is that I never had much in the way of fun even in childhood.
- Newer music generally just doesn't do it for me. But is this uncommon for any generation to prefer music they grew up with?
- I prefer not to talk to a call representative if I can potentially solve my problem with speaking to someone.
- I use the side of the road often because I live out west and travel in rural areas more often than not. I've found as I've gotten older the process of having to stop at a public restroom to be needlessly lengthy.
- I never enjoyed clubs or singles bars.
- I never enjoyed not having adequate parking. This can easily be circumvented by getting up early before normal people more often than not.
- I'm not short, but I do enjoy making fun of my wife for it.
- I don't think that I've never been outgoing, even as a kid?
- I have vested tenure at my job which automatically makes it way easier to not get swept into office politics.
- I exercise more nowadays than I did when I was younger. Exercise and pain are just part of the deal, I've never found it be worse as I've aged.
- I've never enjoyed flying, or more specifically the airport.
- I've never been big on explaining myself just in general. Saying "I dunno" worked fine as a kid.
- Random noise bothers me less now that I'm married. Family trips to Mexico in particular are great for acclimating one to random loud noises.
- My wife is the one who coupons, I've never been big on the practice.
- I wasn't married until my late 30s so I think that I had a sound handle on when relationships weren't working out.
- I have three dogs now and enjoyed raising my most recent from when he was a puppy.
- I've traveled far more than the average person I meet, and I don't like sitting around the house. I don't foresee being comfortable being at home and idle if I make it to retirement age.
Regarding article three, I've never enjoyed life advice from others. Even if they were ultimately correct, I tended to learn things my own way even if it was to my own detriment.
From link 2, for #17, I could never withstand loud noises and still believe those who feel the need to play things loud are rude and selfish.
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 08:54:46 AM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Advertisers.
You're always relevant, it's just that we get less re-programmed by society as each year passes. And that's what makes getting older more of a charm.
With wisdom comes not caring about many things that have no significance to our past nor contain personal relevance in the future.
Quote from: Scott5114 on September 16, 2023, 05:46:13 PM
The older I get, the more I realize how wrong my parents were about things.
There are several stages of this realization:
1) When very young: I know nothing and my parents know everything.
2) Teenager: I know everything and my parents know nothing.
3) In adulthood, after getting knocked down a time or two: I know nothing, and maybe my parents know something.
4) In adulthood, after gaining wisdom: I know nothing, my parents know nothing, and nobody else knows anything either.
I did find as my life wore on that my Dad knew way less than he claimed to have knowledge of. I would say it was even enough to question a lot of things I thought that I knew about him when I was a child. I guess the lesson for me was not to be naive about people, even if they were family members.
Quote from: algorerhythms on September 17, 2023, 11:54:26 AM
Quote from: Scott5114 on September 16, 2023, 05:46:13 PM
The older I get, the more I realize how wrong my parents were about things.
There are several stages of this realization:
1) When very young: I know nothing and my parents know everything.
2) Teenager: I know everything and my parents know nothing.
3) In adulthood, after getting knocked down a time or two: I know nothing, and maybe my parents know something.
4) In adulthood, after gaining wisdom: I know nothing, my parents know nothing, and nobody else knows anything either.
My experience is that maybe my mom knows something I don't, but somehow my dad has managed to know less than nothing about a fair number of things.
I once had very weird brand loyalty to certain things, most notably Heinz ketchup. Once I got money in my bank account for the first time, I realized it just wasn't feasible to just buy Heinz. I still prefer Heinz, but I'd rather save my money than run out of it buying name brand ketchup.
Quote from: LilianaUwU on September 17, 2023, 06:14:36 PM
I once had very weird brand loyalty to certain things, most notably Heinz ketchup. Once I got money in my bank account for the first time, I realized it just wasn't feasible to just buy Heinz. I still prefer Heinz, but I'd rather save my money than run out of it buying name brand ketchup.
Pro tip–always ask for ketchup at fast food places and save the packets you don't use as a Strategic Ketchup Reserve. I only use Heinz and I've never once paid for a bottle.
My wife is big on hoarding fast food condiments. There is an entire door shelf in the fridge with a varying assortment of packs. She's also big on saving unused napkins, but they tend to make their way into the camping and hiking tote.
Right. Makes me wonder about the shelf life of those packets.
I've graduated from collecting the packets to just buying the bottle. I don't go through it that quickly anyway and keeps a mess out of my refrigerator.
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 06:41:10 PM
Right. Makes me wonder about the shelf life of those packets.
Having seen the expiration dates printed on the cartons...way longer than you'd think it is.
Quote from: Scott5114 on September 17, 2023, 06:54:16 PM
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 06:41:10 PM
Right. Makes me wonder about the shelf life of those packets.
Having seen the expiration dates printed on the cartons...way longer than you'd think it is.
Makes me wonder if we should be eating stuff that sits around that long and bacteria won't touch it. :D
If it is properly refrigerated, in a sealed container and within the established shelf life where is the issue? If anything shelf life dates tend to be conservative in their estimates.
Quote from: Max Rockatansky on September 17, 2023, 09:32:27 PM
If it is properly refrigerated, in a sealed container and within the established shelf life where is the issue? If anything shelf life dates tend to be conservative in their estimates.
Enjoy your packets.
For most sauces, you don't even need to refrigerate them. We didn't at Burger King.
True, I just prefer them to be cold for some reason.
Quote from: LilianaUwU on September 17, 2023, 06:14:36 PM
I once had very weird brand loyalty to certain things, most notably Heinz ketchup. Once I got money in my bank account for the first time, I realized it just wasn't feasible to just buy Heinz. I still prefer Heinz, but I'd rather save my money than run out of it buying name brand ketchup.
I used to cut coupons a lot when I first lived away from home, and looked for the store deals of the week, which not only saved a little money but also let you try different brands.
That kind of sounds archaic now. Screens don't like scissors.
In West Virginia, we historically disliked Coca-Cola because it was twice as expensive as either Pepsi or RC in the machine. (The RC and Pepsi machines sold an 8-ounce bottle for a nickel). In a similar vein, when we became adults we still preferred the RC and Pepsi bottled there because they had twice as much fizz as Coke products (even though they were priced the same). Looking back, those facts are inherently connected.
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 08:54:46 AM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Hard for me to put into words, but let's try.
I lived $ELSEWHERE for almost 15 years. When I returned here, I realized everyone had gotten on just fine during that 15 years. And as I started running around again, getting re-acquainted with this area, where I've lived for the vast majority of my life, that almost -everything- had gotten on fine without me, and continues to do so.
There's lots of things I know how to do, that just don't matter anymore, because the things, or processes have evolved, and I get that. But during that 15 years, I was more or less stagnant. Like the Shawshank Redemption guy that knew how to get stuff, in a way. In a few ways, actually.
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 18, 2023, 09:09:26 PM
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 08:54:46 AM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Hard for me to put into words, but let's try.
I lived $ELSEWHERE for almost 15 years. When I returned here, I realized everyone had gotten on just fine during that 15 years. And as I started running around again, getting re-acquainted with this area, where I've lived for the vast majority of my life, that almost -everything- had gotten on fine without me, and continues to do so.
There's lots of things I know how to do, that just don't matter anymore, because the things, or processes have evolved, and I get that. But during that 15 years, I was more or less stagnant. Like the Shawshank Redemption guy that knew how to get stuff, in a way. In a few ways, actually.
You thought people depended on you?
Reads more to me like he feels like he belongs in a world that no longer exists.
Quote from: Rothman on September 18, 2023, 10:13:29 PM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 18, 2023, 09:09:26 PM
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 08:54:46 AM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Hard for me to put into words, but let's try.
I lived $ELSEWHERE for almost 15 years. When I returned here, I realized everyone had gotten on just fine during that 15 years. And as I started running around again, getting re-acquainted with this area, where I've lived for the vast majority of my life, that almost -everything- had gotten on fine without me, and continues to do so.
There's lots of things I know how to do, that just don't matter anymore, because the things, or processes have evolved, and I get that. But during that 15 years, I was more or less stagnant. Like the Shawshank Redemption guy that knew how to get stuff, in a way. In a few ways, actually.
You thought people depended on you?
Not so much 'depended' - I'm not generally comfortable being someone's potential point of failuire, so most that know me, know not to do so. More like ... 'included'.
I suspect what needs to happen, is that I need to understand that living $ELSEWHERE ... has consequences and problems far beyond when you return home.
"Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional" - attributed to Carroll Bryant
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 19, 2023, 07:30:07 AM
Quote from: Rothman on September 18, 2023, 10:13:29 PM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 18, 2023, 09:09:26 PM
Quote from: Rothman on September 17, 2023, 08:54:46 AM
Quote from: zachary_amaryllis on September 17, 2023, 08:07:27 AM
All I know, is that as I get older, I am also becoming less and less relevant.
To whom or to what?
Hard for me to put into words, but let's try.
I lived $ELSEWHERE for almost 15 years. When I returned here, I realized everyone had gotten on just fine during that 15 years. And as I started running around again, getting re-acquainted with this area, where I've lived for the vast majority of my life, that almost -everything- had gotten on fine without me, and continues to do so.
There's lots of things I know how to do, that just don't matter anymore, because the things, or processes have evolved, and I get that. But during that 15 years, I was more or less stagnant. Like the Shawshank Redemption guy that knew how to get stuff, in a way. In a few ways, actually.
You thought people depended on you?
Not so much 'depended' - I'm not generally comfortable being someone's potential point of failuire, so most that know me, know not to do so. More like ... 'included'.
I suspect what needs to happen, is that I need to understand that living $ELSEWHERE ... has consequences and problems far beyond when you return home.
Pretty foreign concept to me, since I've lived in all sorts of places away from "home." Coming back home or visiting my friends and family wherever after a long time doesn't make me feel FOMO due to them just living their lives.
Then again, you might be putting an additional meaning into "$ELSEWHERE" that I'm only partially picking up on.
I've never found moving to different places how much in the way of long term consequences exterior to me. Some immediate family didn't like it when I moved from the Midwest to Phoenix in 2001 but they got over it. I guess while revising places and seeing people I know gives me a slight sense of nostalgia I don't generally feel much beyond that.
Sometimes I still think about abruptly packing up and moving somewhere else just for the expereicne, but I don't know what I would do there, plus now I have my cat who makes this much more complicated.
Plus, I have some intangible attachment to Lake Superior. It's my safety blanket when things get bad, and if I remove myself from where I can easily go there, I'm not sure what would replace it.
Probably loathing where I lived in the Midwest helped me a ton when I was 18 in terms of motivation towards getting out the door. I did move across the country twice with my dog in 2013 and 2016. He loved being in the car on those cross country trips.
Live your own life, and don't try to keep up with the neighbors. I have a nice little house that I maintain inside and out, but if I'm going to do improvements, there has to be a good reason behind it, not because the neighbor got it. If I want something, but don't need it right away, it'll go over to CamelCamelCamel (https://markholtz.info/camelcamelcamel), and wait until it goes on sale. I make sure to set myself up so that I don't need items in a hurry. My fiscal goals include maximizing my retirement contributions and getting my home paid off. It's not sexy, but it's an important goal to me. I've seen times when those purchases ended up owning the owner instead of vice versa. (Nice boat, but aren't we in a middle of a drought when the water doesn't even REACH the boat ramp at Folsom Dam???)
I also never understood the attraction of alcohol and smoking. From what I could see from my perspective, they were just extremely expensive purchases. I'll settle for my colas. Don't get me wrong, it's ok to drink in moderation, but I have seen the consequences where you go beyond a drink or two. I really didn't want to go down that path.
As a kid, I would have loved to have all of the premium movie packages. Mind you, this was the 1980s where VCRs were still a rarity, so you caught the movies when you can. Flash forward to my adulthood of today, and I'm extremely choosy of which streaming services I have... partially because my time is extremely limited and I'm an adult caretaker. I'm still the physical media collector because I don't trust the availability of movies on the streaming services.
Which leads me to another change... for many homes, the television set was a notable feature in the living or family room. Not mine. There is a TV in my home office and a TV in the master bedroom... and that's it. I do want to set up a room with a home theater system, but that is several years away.
I did grow up with frugal German parents, and two of the phrases that I hated were "you have to have the latest and greatest" and "Are you going to pay for that?". First off, "latest and greatest".... but then I turn around and make it last for years. There are actually features that are worth paying for in the "deluxe" model that are missing in the cheap "base" model. Take my garage door opener. It has a battery backup in case of a power outage, WiFi connectivity, and a feature to close the garage door automatically after a certain amount of time. (I had one too many "did I leave the garage door open? Let me turn around and drive back 30 minutes only to see that it was closed" moments). As a bonus, it's a way for Amazon to deliver packages securely. You won't believe how nice it is when the washing machine and dryer interfaces with Alexa and lets me know when the washing machine and dryer are done.... especially when I'm working away on the other side of the house. Secondly, "Are you going to pay for that?" doesn't have the same meaning. The last time that was used by my mother on me was at Sam's Club in regards to a cart to help with gardening supplies, and when she used that phrase on me, that cart turned into a purchase. That cart has turned to be extremely helpful over the years.
Quote from: ZLoth on September 23, 2023, 11:57:45 AM
Which leads me to another change... for many homes, the television set was a notable feature in the living or family room. Not mine. There is a TV in my home office and a TV in the master bedroom... and that's it. I do want to set up a room with a home theater system, but that is several years away.
When my wife and I first got married, we made the decision to
not have a TV in the bedroom. The bedroom is for sleeping and "sleeping" only. Nowadays, 17½ years later, we still don't have a TV in the bedroom. The main TV is in the living room. There's also one in the basement, which doubles as the older two boys' bedroom and get-away-from-everyone-else-room.
We have a TV in the bedroom but it only gets used maybe a dozen times a year. About half those times it is used as noise cover for "other" activities.
Quote from: kphoger on September 25, 2023, 09:53:07 AM
Quote from: ZLoth on September 23, 2023, 11:57:45 AM
Which leads me to another change... for many homes, the television set was a notable feature in the living or family room. Not mine. There is a TV in my home office and a TV in the master bedroom... and that's it. I do want to set up a room with a home theater system, but that is several years away.
When my wife and I first got married, we made the decision to not have a TV in the bedroom. The bedroom is for sleeping and "sleeping" only. Nowadays, 17½ years later, we still don't have a TV in the bedroom. The main TV is in the living room. There's also one in the basement, which doubles as the older two boys' bedroom and get-away-from-everyone-else-room.
I understand and respect your position. Thing is, even though I am the homeowner, my 82yo mother has the master bedroom, and she likes to watch her
Golden Girls,
Ice Road Truckers, and whatever History Vault has on. There is no good place to put a television in my own bedroom, thus it's either a tablet or phone.
As for the TV in my office... most of the time, it's for watching football games or serving as a monitor for one of my secondary computers whenever severe weather blows through the DFW area.