I just got fired

[Scott5114]

I met my wife at work—we were both slot attendants, and I had trained her when she transferred from security. We had just went on our first date when I got a voicemail for an interview for a promotion that would have made me her supervisor. I didn't call back to schedule the interview. I don't think I've ever made a decision that seemed more clearly correct in hindsight—I of course married my wife, and the guy who got the promotion ended up being so stressed out from it that he died of a heart attack.

[kkt]

At my own company, I've witnessed employees become romantically involved and then break up—even to the point of marriage and divorce.  The work relationship at that point is never good, and most times one of them has left the company.

People getting into relationships at work isn't always something that blows up or even violates office policy.  At my current office the rule is that a superior can't date a subordinate.  Given that there is a lot of different departments there is a lot of leeway.  Supposedly if a relationship were to develop in the same department HR would just transfer one person (if available).  That of course requires both parties report said relationship to HR.

Did I fail to mention that the lady who got married to a co-worker and then later divorced was HR?  In fact, she and the gentleman were my two bosses (it's a small company, so responsibilities are divided up in strange ways, but I work in conjunction with both 'departments').  She then left the company, and he started spending a lot of time with her replacement—so much so that her husband ended up divorcing her.  He has now since left as well (career change), but company Christmas parties to which some or all of them still get invited are kind of awkward.

I have a related HR story that is particularly juicy but I can't really share publicly.  I'll just say that HR people aren't exactly always beyond reproach with questionable interactions with co-workers.

Tease.

[hbelkins]

Dating in the workplace just seems a recipe for disaster.  Heck, I dated a woman from our close-knit decent-sized group of friends and our breakup wasn't the greatest for the group.  Can't imagine what would happen in the workplace if there's a bad breakup.

I once had a notable co-worker (now deceased) who used to have a saying about that: "Don't get your meat where you get your bread."

[seicer]

"Don't dip your pen in the company ink."

"Don't build a campfire where you store the dynamite."

"Keep the honey out of the money."

"If you dip your spoon in the company stew, don't complain when it burns you."

[Max Rockatansky]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

[Rothman]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

It only raises the chances of such.

[Max Rockatansky]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

It only raises the chances of such.

It isn't on the top five most common things I've interviewed people for related workplace misconduct.  It might not even be in the top ten if I sat down and audited what I've interviewed people for.

[Rothman]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

It only raises the chances of such.

It isn't on the top five most common things I've interviewed people for related workplace misconduct.  It might not even be in the top ten if I sat down and audited what I've interviewed people for.

Probably because most people are smart enough to avoid such in the workplace.

[DTComposer]

My wife and I started dating while working together (and I was her supervisor!) - although we had met years before and our paths had crossed many times through gigs and friends. We both knew pretty quickly that we were in it for the long haul.

A couple of months in we told my supervisor (who was also our good friend) - then a couple of months after that we told our Board (we were at a non-profit). They had us sign a document regarding in-workplace relationships (basically to cover their butts if things went sideways), and a few months later, I was promoted to a vacant position and was no longer her supervisor. We got married while working there, but moved away a few months after that.

Side note: we were running the youth program part of our company, and while we thought we were relatively discreet (absolutely no PDAs, always drove to work separately, etc.), when we announced our relationship to the kids at an end-of-year party, we were greeted with a chorus of "we KNEW it!!" and "we had been shipping you so hard!" 

[Max Rockatansky]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

It only raises the chances of such.

It isn't on the top five most common things I've interviewed people for related workplace misconduct.  It might not even be in the top ten if I sat down and audited what I've interviewed people for.

Probably because most people are smart enough to avoid such in the workplace.

I don't know, the majority of terminations I've been involved with investigating usually pertained to people doing something incredibly stupid.

[Scott5114]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

It only raises the chances of such.

In-work relationships do indeed raise the chance of encountering corporate culture truisms.  Sometimes you just have to touch base in order to circle back to platform your synergy.

[kphoger]

My wife is in charge of the nursery at church.  We require each children's classroom to have two adults present at all times, as a CYA protocol:  in case there's ever any accusation of inappropriate conduct, there's always going to be a 3rd-party witness.  But opinions are split as to whether a husband and wife should be able to count as those two adults, because it might be assumed the one couldn't function as an unbiased witness against the other.

[Scott5114]

But opinions are split as to whether a husband and wife should be able to count as those two adults, because it might be assumed the one couldn't function as an unbiased witness against the other.

I would have to imagine that someone brazen enough to abuse a child in front of someone else would only do so if they knew for a fact that the person wouldn't rat them out. And for most people, your spouse is one of the few people you can trust to stay silent to others about your shortcomings.

[ClassicHasClass]

Dating in the workplace just seems a recipe for disaster.  Heck, I dated a woman from our close-knit decent-sized group of friends and our breakup wasn't the greatest for the group.  Can't imagine what would happen in the workplace if there's a bad breakup.

I once had a notable co-worker (now deceased) who used to have a saying about that: "Don't get your meat where you get your bread."

This seems like a riff on "don't crap where you eat."

[hbelkins]

When I met my wife and started dating her, we worked for different employers. Then my boss bought out her boss and we became co-workers, although at different locations.

[TheCatalyst31]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

I used to work at a company with thousands of employees, and not only were in-company relationships tolerated there, they were borderline encouraged. That being said, with a company that big there was a good chance you'd never actually work with your partner if you were in different departments. Things get messier at a ten-person company.

[Rothman]

Never been a fan of corporate culture truisms myself.  I think enough reputable people have commented here about in-work relationships to provide evidence that isn't a sure fire job-related death sentence. 

I used to work at a company with thousands of employees, and not only were in-company relationships tolerated there, they were borderline encouraged. That being said, with a company that big there was a good chance you'd never actually work with your partner if you were in different departments. Things get messier at a ten-person company.

Heh.  When I worked at a large law firm in DC, an associate lawyer was complaining that spouses or guests were not allowed at firm functions.  He quipped, "We work all day, we sometimes even sleep here, are they implying they want us to sleep together now?"