__________ is/are overrated.

[kphoger]

Attending weddings.  I can't think of anything more dull than just hanging out for hours just to celebrate someone else's happiness.  Since I've gotten married myself I usually find myself at someone's wedding at least 3-5 times a year. 

If I had my own wedding to do over again, I would keep the following things in mind:

— A huge, fancy, flowy wedding dress is overrated.  I'd suggest that my bride wear a less gaudy one.  Maybe even *gasp* something that isn't even white.

— Matching outfits for the bridesmaids and groomsmen are overrated.  Just give them a basic color scheme, perhaps, and leave  it at that.  Or say to the guys, "wear a suit or sport coat that's either black or grey" or "wear a white shirt with a blue tie".  Then there's at least a >0% chance they can actually wear something they already have.

— Unity rituals are overrated.  Like lighting a unity candle or whatever.  Honestly, in the 16 years we've been married, I can count the number of times our parents have been together on one hand.  And we only live 300 miles apart.  And they don't have anything in common.  And they hadn't even met each other before the week of the wedding.  Why did we include that dumb little ritual in our wedding?

— Waiting until after the wedding to do photos is overrated.  It isn't the 1800s:  you can see the bride in her dress before the wedding.  Don't leave all the guests on their own during the reception so you can strike 625 different poses with different permutations of the same 16 people.  Do that ahead of time.



Speaking from experiences of being involved in someone else's wedding:

— Wedding coordinators are overrated.  If I were the groom, I wouldn't want someone else making my decisions for me.  And, as a musician, I don't appreciate being micromanaged.  If the bride and groom can't make their own decisions, then the pastor should.  If the pastor is also incapable of making decisions, then that's just way too many indecisive people in one place.

— The same old processional music is overrated.  There's a whole wealth of suitable classical music out there–and that's not even counting all the good popular music.  Be creative.  Try.

— Writing your own wedding vows is overrated.  All you end up with are vows that are cheesier and yet somehow less meaningful than the good old standard ones.  Chances are you're not a poet, and that fact will just be painfully obvious.  Instead of taking an hour to write your own vows, spend that hour memorizing the normal ones so you can say them without being prompted by the pastor every three words.

[kphoger]

In my neck of the woods, within the past year or so, some places I go to have re-labeled their single-occupant washrooms from men/women to gender-neutral.  Maybe the legal requirements have been relaxed, or they're location dependent.

It's definitely location dependent.  These things are generally state laws and/or local ordinances.

[kphoger]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

[Max Rockatansky]

Attending weddings.  I can't think of anything more dull than just hanging out for hours just to celebrate someone else's happiness.  Since I've gotten married myself I usually find myself at someone's wedding at least 3-5 times a year. 

If I had my own wedding to do over again, I would keep the following things in mind:

— A huge, fancy, flowy wedding dress is overrated.  I'd suggest that my bride wear a less gaudy one.  Maybe even *gasp* something that isn't even white.

— Matching outfits for the bridesmaids and groomsmen are overrated.  Just give them a basic color scheme, perhaps, and leave  it at that.  Or say to the guys, "wear a suit or sport coat that's either black or grey" or "wear a white shirt with a blue tie".  Then there's at least a >0% chance they can actually wear something they already have.

— Unity rituals are overrated.  Like lighting a unity candle or whatever.  Honestly, in the 16 years we've been married, I can count the number of times our parents have been together on one hand.  And we only live 300 miles apart.  And they don't have anything in common.  And they hadn't even met each other before the week of the wedding.  Why did we include that dumb little ritual in our wedding?

— Waiting until after the wedding to do photos is overrated.  It isn't the 1800s:  you can see the bride in her dress before the wedding.  Don't leave all the guests on their own during the reception so you can strike 625 different poses with different permutations of the same 16 people.  Do that ahead of time.



Speaking from experiences of being involved in someone else's wedding:

— Wedding coordinators are overrated.  If I were the groom, I wouldn't want someone else making my decisions for me.  And, as a musician, I don't appreciate being micromanaged.  If the bride and groom can't make their own decisions, then the pastor should.  If the pastor is also incapable of making decisions, then that's just way too many indecisive people in one place.

— The same old processional music is overrated.  There's a whole wealth of suitable classical music out there–and that's not even counting all the good popular music.  Be creative.  Try.

— Writing your own wedding vows is overrated.  All you end up with are vows that are cheesier and yet somehow less meaningful than the good old standard ones.  Chances are you're not a poet, and that fact will just be painfully obvious.  Instead of taking an hour to write your own vows, spend that hour memorizing the normal ones so you can say them without being prompted by the pastor every three words.

Originally my now wife and I didn't even want to do a wedding.  We wanted to go to the county courthouse and just get everything done there considering how much cheaper it would be.  We planned on maybe having a small impromptu celebration/hike at Yosemite for maybe a dozen or so close friends/family.  My wife ended up getting talked to an actual wedding at the end of the day.  The conclusion I came to it was more of a reason for other people to party than for us to have a good time.  Considering we had over 200 people and came out spending only about $7,000 dollars it could have been so much worse.  If I remember right we did make up $5,400 dollars via cash and gift cards given out at our wedding.  The best cost saver for as hiring a taco truck for $1,400 dollars to cater dinner. 

So I suppose a net operating loss of $1,600 dollars for a wedding was something I could live with.  The engagement ring I bought was pretty close to that price too, but I didn't count that as part of the wedding budget considering it was purchased a year prior.

[Max Rockatansky]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

Worked for two our employees on base in Key West.  They paid $250 a month to live in the campground, but had to switch between the two locations every two weeks.  Way better than paying $1,900 out in town or having to bunk up with 3/4 roommates.  That campground had grills and access to a shower.  The store even had post office boxes available for rent at $10 dollars a month.

[kphoger]

Originally my now wife and I didn't even want to do a wedding.  We wanted to go to the county courthouse and just get everything done there considering how much cheaper it would be.  We planned on maybe having a small impromptu celebration/hike at Yosemite for maybe a dozen or so close friends/family.

My sister got married a few years ago on my parents' back porch, and my dad officiated the wedding.  My family of five was in attendance, plus my parents' next-door neighbors.  That was it.  Until about five minutes before the wedding, my sister was still just wearing bicycle shorts and a sports bra.  For the after-wedding music, she had the Google device play a set of songs she had picked out ahead of time.

[kphoger]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

Worked for two our employees on base in Key West.  They paid $250 a month to live in the campground, but had to switch between the two locations every two weeks.  Way better than paying $1,900 out in town or having to bunk up with 3/4 roommates.  That campground had grills and access to a shower.  The store even had post office boxes available for rent at $10 dollars a month.

Oh yeah, I used to work with a guy who lived in a tent in a state park with his girlfriend.  But I'm guessing that's not the alternative |snowc| had in mind when he claimed that houses are overrated.  Especially when thunderstorms strike, I'm curious to know where he'd prefer to be living.

[Max Rockatansky]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

Worked for two our employees on base in Key West.  They paid $250 a month to live in the campground, but had to switch between the two locations every two weeks.  Way better than paying $1,900 out in town or having to bunk up with 3/4 roommates.  That campground had grills and access to a shower.  The store even had post office boxes available for rent at $10 dollars a month.

Oh yeah, I used to work with a guy who lived in a tent in a state park with his girlfriend.  But I'm guessing that's not the alternative |snowc| had in mind when he claimed that houses are overrated.  Especially when thunderstorms strike, I'm curious to know where he'd prefer to be living.

I suspect a hotel with a Plum Crazy R/T Charger in front of it.

[formulanone]

My sister got married a few years ago on my parents' back porch, and my dad officiated the wedding.

I dunno, that's kind of like the judge's son being the traffic cop who writes my speeding ticket. But...eh, doesn't really matter.

[abefroman329]

That's an average of once every four years.

I don't often agree with Mr. Rothman on a great many topics, but I'm pretty sure I've gone 40 years without accidentally walking into the women's room. And I've been drunk in public many times.

This includes times where I've started to walk in the direction of the ladies' room and caught myself before opening the door or walking in.

Anyway, pedantry.

[Scott5114]

The game store that my friends used to run was required to have two single-use bathrooms by city code. They started out as labeled "men" and "women", but over time LGBT folks started becoming a large portion of their customer base, and some of them had a talk with the owners about the situation. So they changed the signs on both doors to this, and it worked well for the rest of the time the store was open.

[SSOWorld]

Having separate men's and women's restrooms is overrated.

It'd be a hell of a lot more efficient if we didn't.  No more long lines for the ladies' room and short lines for the men's room, or vice versa.

But, the children!

[J N Winkler]

I've accidentally walked into the ladies' room numerous times.  These days, if I walk into the men's room and don't immediately see urinals, I freak out and run to confirm I walked into the correct restroom.

I have done this quite a few times (maybe even more than 10), invariably without alcohol involvement.  Sometimes I get disoriented; sometimes I misinterpret building layouts; sometimes the signing is unclear, hard to see, so self-consciously clever as to be hard to interpret, or in a language where the words for men and women are virtually the same (I can't remember which way bay/bayan goes in Turkish); and sometimes restroom locations are flipped across floors (e.g., common entry but with women on the right on one floor and on the left on the next).

I dislike the peekaboo stall dividers used in the US.  European ones are generally of sturdier construction, offer a better guarantee of privacy, and are typically equipped much better for feminine hygienic needs (e.g., a receptacle next to the toilet for used tampons or sanitary napkins).  And I consider urinals suitable for use in desperation only.  Unless I have all clothing off between waist and mid-thigh, my bladder will not void fully.

[Max Rockatansky]

Having separate men's and women's restrooms is overrated.

It'd be a hell of a lot more efficient if we didn't.  No more long lines for the ladies' room and short lines for the men's room, or vice versa.

But, the children!

Children are overrated. 

[abefroman329]

Having separate men's and women's restrooms is overrated.

It'd be a hell of a lot more efficient if we didn't.  No more long lines for the ladies' room and short lines for the men's room, or vice versa.

But, the children!

I wonder if the Helen Lovejoys of the world know that fathers bring their young daughters into the men's room with them.

[TheHighwayMan3561]

I remember how agitating it was having to wait for two dudes in front of me to take long dumps in a one-room bathroom while the women's room sat unused the entire time.

[jeffandnicole]

Working in a few bowling centers when I was younger, I had to go into the women's room nearly every shift to clean and check or add toilet paper or towels.  I'd always yell in first.  Some women, especially during league nights, didn't care if I went in there when they were in there.

Never been in my office's women's room, although at one point we had a detailed blueprint of sorts out on the breakroom wall showing the floor's configuration.  Both men and women were surprised that, for some reason, the bathrooms are designed where the men's room has 2 doors to go thru; the women's room has 1 door.

Last time I went into the wrong sex's bathroom accidentally was at a restaurant. I *really had to go*...went into a stall and realized after someone else came in that the someone else was a woman.  Not much I could do at that point. 

[kphoger]

Having separate men's and women's restrooms is overrated.

It'd be a hell of a lot more efficient if we didn't.  No more long lines for the ladies' room and short lines for the men's room, or vice versa.

But, the children!

I wonder if the Helen Lovejoys of the world know that fathers bring their young daughters into the men's room with them.

To be fair, they do have their father with them in that situation.  (I am a father who has taken his young daughter into the men's room.  Heck, I even took her into a big common shower room at a seminary once.  I'm not exactly a prude when it comes to nudity.)

But honestly, I think the risk of harm to the children is overrated here anyway.  Something like 90% of sexual abuse victims are not strangers:  they are friends, family, or acquaintances of the offender.  And are we really pretending there isn't a large subset of male pedophiles who abuse boys in addition to or instead of girls?

[JoePCool14]

Attending weddings.  I can't think of anything more dull than just hanging out for hours just to celebrate someone else's happiness.  Since I've gotten married myself I usually find myself at someone's wedding at least 3-5 times a year.

I definitely don't have much interest in attending other couple's weddings unless I myself am in a relationship where things are moving in the right direction, or if I'm already married. Otherwise, it honestly just sounds depressing.

[Max Rockatansky]

Attending weddings.  I can't think of anything more dull than just hanging out for hours just to celebrate someone else's happiness.  Since I've gotten married myself I usually find myself at someone's wedding at least 3-5 times a year.

I definitely don't have much interest in attending other couple's weddings unless I myself am in a relationship where things are moving in the right direction, or if I'm already married. Otherwise, it honestly just sounds depressing.

For me the scenario even now has several drawbacks:

-  I find it difficult to maintain extended "small talk."
-  Long ceremonies are something I find incredibly boring, even worse if they are dragged out by religious traditions. 
-  Most wedding ceremonies go late into the night, usually I'm in bed by 9:30-10 PM.
-  I can dance, but suck at it.  My wife tends to nitpick over my dancing which I think it's a misguided attempt to get me to loosen up.

[snowc]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

It was just a piece of the siding that ripped, so no need for the tent. 

[Max Rockatansky]

Houses.
Our house now has to be assessed for damages caused by a thunderstorm. Our vinyl siding was completely blown.
Estimated wind speeds of HURRICANE force. Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.
Well played nature. You destroyed my house.

What's your preferred alternative, then?  You gonna live in a tent?

It was just a piece of the siding that ripped, so no need for the tent. 

So no need for your overrated post?

[1995hoo]

....

but I'd be very embarrassed to have loud gas and a foul smell accompanying a bowel movement if women were in the same room.

I'd be embarrassed if that happened in front of anyone.  It's why I try to poop when I'm at home.

....

You sure your name's not Finch?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_khvWHplL7w

[kphoger]

For me the scenario even now has several drawbacks:

-  Long ceremonies are something I find incredibly boring, even worse if they are dragged out by religious traditions.

See, I'm the opposite.

If you expect us all to buy you a gift, dress up fancy, come in from out of town, book a hotel, and/or whatever–then the event you invited us to had darned-well better last more than twenty minutes.  If not, then the message I'm getting is that you expect your wedding to be more important to us than it apparently is to you.  If I had to buy new dress clothes for my children, take a day off work, drive 600 miles in the rain, pretend to think it's cute when the flower girl refuses to walk down the aisle, and suffer through your sad and sappy attempt at personalized wedding vows–then, for the sake of all that, at least have the decency to make the reason for it all last longer than a half-hour sitcom on Netflix.

On the other hand, if all you want is a short and simple exchange of vows with no drawn-out ceremony, then why did you bother sending out hundreds of invitations to cousins you haven't seen in two decades and acquaintances you're only kinda sorta friends with, making everyone in your bridal party buy gaudy dresses they'll never wear again, trying multiple cake samples from a professional baker, stressing out a young mother by choosing her two-year-old terror to be a ring bearer, securing a restaurant party room for the rehearsal dinner, and all the other rigmarole that comes with a fancy affair?  If you want something short and sweet, then just do it in someone's back yard, or rent a neighborhood park pavilion, and only invite the people closest to you–letting everyone else off the hook.

*whew*

[kphoger]

Our vinyl siding was completely blown.

Now we may have to gut our house and rebuild it.

You destroyed my house.

It was just a piece of the siding that ripped

So......  It wasn't 'completely blown.  And you certainly won't have to 'rebuild' your house.  And it wasn't 'destroyed'.

Were you just joking the first time, or were you trying to make your situation seem more dramatic than it actually was in order to feel important?