Daily conversation: What is the worst possible answer?

[kphoger]

Those fake license plates with first names that kids put on their bicycles.

I have early childhood memories of making my own license plates for my Big Wheel.  Did anyone else do this?

[freebrickproductions]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Goats.

[pderocco]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Tapping.

[formulanone]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Whatever the fuck those things "sovereign citizens" like(d) to put on their cars were.

People who have confused the novelty section of a Stuckey's with the play Hamilton, in conjunction with their fascination for exploding metal penises.

[kphoger]

People who have confused the novelty section of a Stuckey's with the play Hamilton, in conjunction with their fascination for exploding metal penises.

How could anyone possibly find an exploding metal penis anything BUT fascinating?

[Scott5114]

License plates should be done away with, replaced by

A loudspeaker that plays a recording loop of the TikTok text-to-speech voice saying the registration number.

[1995hoo]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Tapping.

Gives new meaning to "I'd tap that." 

[PColumbus73]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Lasagna, or pasta dish of choice

[kphoger]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

... the actual registration receipt, affixed to the bumper, protected from the elements by one of these:

[TheCatalyst31]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Painting your social security number on your bumper.

[vdeane]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Nothing. It's all common law now.

Except classic cars which, due to their relative scarcity, fall under uncommon law.

[LilianaUwU]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

"Y'all get license plates?" -Las Vegas, probably

[CoreySamson]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Toll transponders mounted on the plate holder.

[formulanone]

21 AUG 2025:

License plates should be done away with, replaced by ________.

Your name, phone number, and likeness, akin to miniature attorney advertisements. Preferably holding a hammer, giving a stern appearance, or perhaps the look of lips smacking at the thought of a big payout. At the bottom will be the requisite tiny text proclaiming who will really represent you in a court of law or perhaps at a food court.

[kphoger]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Note:  Bear in mind that the eastern endpoint of I-70 is NOT the Security Blvd Park & Ride.  Google Maps is wrong.  The route was truncated to I-695 back in 2014.  I-70 has not come within 1½ miles of Baltimore city limits for eleven years now.  Of course, I'm sure everyone already knew that.

[hotdogPi]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Sacramento, South Lake Tahoe, Ely, Salina, Salina, Midway, Vandalia, Vandalia, Licking View, Washington, JCT PA TURNPIKE, Halfway, Almost Baltimore But Not Quite, Francis Scott Key Tunnel, MILFord, Milton, Cape May

[Max Rockatansky]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Note:  Bear in mind that the eastern endpoint of I-70 is NOT the Security Blvd Park & Ride.  Google Maps is wrong.  The route was truncated to I-695 back in 2014.  I-70 has not come within 1½ miles of Baltimore city limits for eleven years now.  Of course, I'm sure everyone already knew that.

Ely, Tonopah, Mammoth Lakes and Los Banos.

Oh wait, that actually was once seriously considered...

[I-55]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

The Desert, Long Tunnel, Narrow Tunnel, Breezewood, Canceled Freeways, Collapsed Bridge. Nobody's trying to get anywhere else anyway.

[Dirt Roads]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

The Desert, Long Tunnel, Narrow Tunnel, Breezewood, Canceled Freeways, Collapsed Bridge. Nobody's trying to get anywhere else anyway.

Ouch!  Two exits in Baltimore.

[jmacswimmer]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

I think I originally made this back during the HighwayStar days and still had it saved:

Note:  Bear in mind that the eastern endpoint of I-70 is NOT the Security Blvd Park & Ride.  Google Maps is wrong.  The route was truncated to I-695 back in 2014.  I-70 has not come within 1½ miles of Baltimore city limits for eleven years now.  Of course, I'm sure everyone already knew that.

Weirdly enough, Google Maps is halfway there - if you zoom in on the piece between I-695 and the Park & Ride, it'll then show MD 570 (the official unsigned designation) alongside I-70.

[kphoger]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Westbound
Washington County
Pennsylvania and Other Great Lakes States
Washington County
West Virginia, Ohio, and Points West
Ohio and Other East North Central States
Preble County
Indiana and Other Plains States
Vigo County
Illinois and Other Midwestern States
St Clair County
Missouri and Other Central States
Jackson County
Kansas and Other Western States
Sherman County
Colorado and Other Mountain States
Mesa County
Utah and Other Desert States
Beaver County

[JayhawkCO]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Eastbound:
Limon
West Baltimore
Central Baltimore

[PColumbus73]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Mormons
Marijuana
Barbeque
River
Ohio
Washingtons
Crabs

[kphoger]

... Salina, Salina ... Vandalia, Vandalia ...

By the way, these are my favorites so far.

[1995hoo]

22 AUG 2025:

Propose a new and improved list of control cities for I-70.

Note:  Bear in mind that the eastern endpoint of I-70 is NOT the Security Blvd Park & Ride.  Google Maps is wrong.  The route was truncated to I-695 back in 2014.  I-70 has not come within 1½ miles of Baltimore city limits for eleven years now.  Of course, I'm sure everyone already knew that.

Eastbound:
Rockies
Monarchs
Royals
Cardinals
Indians
Dragons
Clippers
Keys
TO Iron Birds and TO Baysox

(As to that last one, I'm making sure to observe kphoger's admonition! )

Westbound:
Reverse all of those and use TO Bees as the westernmost one.