AARoads Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Pages: [1]   Go Down

Author Topic: Famous Stand Up Lines  (Read 254 times)

roadman65

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 8862
  • Location: Orlando, fl
  • Last Login: Today at 12:01:55 AM
Famous Stand Up Lines
« on: March 14, 2019, 11:40:42 PM »
Rodney Dangerfield:  My wife told me to take out the garbage.  I said to her "You cooked it, you take it out!"
Logged
Every day is a winding road, you just got to get used to it.

Sheryl Crowe

Takumi

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3575
  • #yogapantsbutnotstance

  • Age: 33
  • Location: Greater Richmond
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 06:32:55 PM
    • Flashing Lights (blog)
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2019, 12:54:19 AM »
Logged
Quote from: Pete from Boston on February 21, 2016, 01:04:24 PM
Don't pick apart my vision of complete psychotic breakdown, please.  I'm trying to make a point here.

Insta | Kinja

abefroman329

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3054
  • Age: 39
  • Location: Chicago
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 09:03:15 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2019, 06:36:49 AM »
Famous for all the wrong reasons: Fifty years ago we’d have had you hanging upside down from a tree with a pitchfork in your ass!
Logged

GaryV

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 856
  • Location: Southeast Michigan
  • Last Login: March 24, 2019, 07:53:16 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2019, 06:59:21 AM »
Henny Youngman:  Take my wife ... please!
Logged

abefroman329

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3054
  • Age: 39
  • Location: Chicago
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 09:03:15 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2019, 09:23:45 AM »
Quote from: Takumi on March 15, 2019, 12:54:19 AM
I haven't slept for a week...because that would be too long.
Logged

Takumi

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3575
  • #yogapantsbutnotstance

  • Age: 33
  • Location: Greater Richmond
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 06:32:55 PM
    • Flashing Lights (blog)
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2019, 11:02:16 AM »
Quote from: abefroman329 on March 15, 2019, 09:23:45 AM
Quote from: Takumi on March 15, 2019, 12:54:19 AM
I haven't slept for a week...because that would be too long.
I tried to walk into Target and missed.
Logged
Quote from: Pete from Boston on February 21, 2016, 01:04:24 PM
Don't pick apart my vision of complete psychotic breakdown, please.  I'm trying to make a point here.

Insta | Kinja

wxfree

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 1016
  • Age: -1
  • Location: Over there
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 05:04:53 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2019, 12:25:24 PM »
Quote from: abefroman329 on March 15, 2019, 09:23:45 AM
Quote from: Takumi on March 15, 2019, 12:54:19 AM
I haven't slept for a week...because that would be too long.

In a similar vein: "24 hour banking, I don't have time for it."

I forgot who said that, but I heard it a long time ago and never forgot it.
Logged
All of my posts represent my personal opinions and the official views of any governmental agency that has good sense.

abefroman329

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3054
  • Age: 39
  • Location: Chicago
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 09:03:15 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2019, 12:55:00 PM »
Oh no, I've got...HAPPY FEET!
Logged

wanderer2575

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 625
  • Location: Farmington Hills, MI
  • Last Login: March 24, 2019, 10:01:45 PM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2019, 08:08:24 PM »
A member of Group A, a member of Group B, and a member of Group C walk into a bar...
Logged

inkyatari

  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 1312
  • Widen I-80 through all of Illinois!

  • Age: 50
  • Location: Morris, IL
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 04:28:33 PM
    • Pie Factory Podcast - Classic Arcade gaming talk
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #9 on: March 18, 2019, 05:14:54 PM »
"Well EXCUUUUSSSEEEE ME!"
Logged
I'm never wrong, just wildly inaccurate.

SSOWorld

  • 'Sconsin
  • *
  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 3029
  • Interstate <Make up your mind!>

  • Age: 45
  • Location: MAH House!
  • Last Login: Today at 04:50:07 AM
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #10 on: March 18, 2019, 07:37:38 PM »
Logged
Scott O.

Not all who wander are lost...
Ah, the open skies, wind at my back, warm sun on my... wait, where the hell am I?!
As a matter of fact, I do own the road.
Raise your what?

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/ssoworld-roads/

Wisconsin - out-multiplexing your state since 1918.

US71

  • Road Scholar , Master of Snark
  • *
  • Offline Offline

  • Posts: 8342
  • Sign Inspector

  • Age: 59
  • Location: On the road again
  • Last Login: March 25, 2019, 11:01:59 PM
    • The Road Less Taken
Re: Famous Stand Up Lines
« Reply #11 on: March 20, 2019, 11:00:07 PM »
"I heard from my cat's lawyer today. My cat wants $12,000 a week for Tender Vittles" --Johnny Carson
Logged
a man hears what he wants to hear
And disregards the rest -- Simon & Garfunkel
Pages: [1]   Go Up
 


Opinions expressed here on belong solely to the poster and do not represent or reflect the opinions or beliefs of AARoads, its creators and/or associates.